Mike Shinoda Admits Metallica Gig Wasn’t *Completely* Soul-Crushing
So, DJ EFN and N.O.R.E., those titans of insightful celebrity interviews (aka “Drink Champs”, presented by Revolt), managed to snag…
Author: Chord F. Discord
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could "play the kazoo in four languages."
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
Breaking News: Old Dude Shreds, Band You Kinda Remember Plays Some Tunes at Festival You’ve Never Heard Of
Alright, metalheads (and metal-adjacent folks who accidentally clicked on this), buckle up because we’re about to dissect some drama! ARDENNERY,…
Trump, Where’s Our Eurovision? U.S. Housewives Seek European Festivity
A recent uproar among American housewives has sparked an unexpected event — a class-action lawsuit against local TV broadcasting companies.…
Geriatric Rockers and Late Night Host Shill Out for Overpriced Coffee: A Tragedy in Four Lattes
LEGENDS OF CLASSIC ROCK, a supergroup so legendary it makes Spinal Tap look like a well-adjusted support group, graced the…
VIVIAN CAMPBELL, Against All Odds (and Doctors), Still Ripping With DEF LEPPARD After Dodging Death (Again)
BREAKING: Has-Been Band DEF LEPPARD Hauls Vivian Campbell’s Corpse Onstage For One Last Paycheck! 👴🎸💀 So, apparently, DEF LEPPARD, those…
FOO FIGHTERS KICK OUT JOSH FREESE?! He’s TOTALLY FINE GUYS, Just Mildly Annoyed They Replaced Him With a Drum Machine
Drummer Josh Freese has been FIRED from the FOO FIGHTERS! 🤣 Did anyone actually notice he was even *in* the…
The Rasmus, bless their hearts, Unveil ‘Weirdo’ Album Deets & Drop Another Earworm ‘Break These Chains’ (Please Don’t)
Okay, so apparently THE RASMUS, those guys who peaked in, like, 2003 with “In the Shadows” (still a banger, let’s…
PRESIDENT’s Debut Single: ‘In The Name Of The Father’ – Or How We Learned To Stop Worrying And Love the Autotune
Behold! PRESIDENT, the most mysterious (and probably overhyped) masked British rock band EVER, has graced us with their debut single,…
JOHN 5 UNLEASHES ‘FIEND’ UPON UNWARY EARS, ARONOFF’S DRUMS SOMEHOW INVOLVED
OMG! 😱🎸 Shred Lord John 5, fresh from his totally-not-controversial-at-all gig replacing Mick Mars in Mötley Crüe (more on that…
Orianthi Dares to Release ‘Some Kind Of Feeling’ Album, Unleashes ‘Attention’ Single (As If We Didn’t Already Know She Wanted It)
OMG! 😱🎸 Orianthi, she of the almost-was-but-not-quite Michael Jackson fame, is dropping a new album called “Some Kind Of Feeling”!…