WASHINGTON—Raising questions over the ethics of profiting in private business ventures while still holding office, a report released Tuesday found that President Donald Trump has made almost $1.4 billion in his second term selling Tupperware to friends. “Since officially reclaiming the presidency in January 2025, Donald Trump has used the multitude of connections associated with the presidency to move a massive quantity of food storage containers and other kitchen accessories,” the report concluded, citing a recent Cabinet meeting in which the president demonstrated the leak-proof lids of a three-piece bowl set and strongly advised everyone in attendance to purchase the containers, as well as a companion set of stackable tumblers. “Not only has Trump convened several emergency sessions of Congress to pitch the FridgeSmart storage four-pack to lawmakers, he’s also leveraged his position on the international stage. For example, he appears to be attending this week’s NATO summit solely because the member nations seemed amenable to purchasing millions of space-saving two-quart pitchers in exchange for increased U.S. support for Ukraine. Evidently, when you’re the president of the United States, you can pressure a lot of people into buying a lot of Tupperware.” At press time, a panicking Vice President JD Vance was reportedly struggling to come up with the $500,000 he had pledged for the hundreds of boxes of liquid-tight serving bowls that were now stacked in front of his home.
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Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
