Liberal White Women Stand Weeping Outside Court Trying Jack The Ripper
LONDON — Dozens of liberal white women gathered outside a local courthouse, weeping and holding signs of support for…
Category: Babylon Bee
A.I. Assistant Starting To Suspect Its Human Might Be A Bit Of A Moron
CYBERSPACE — An A.I. assistant working with a middle-aged dad from Maine reportedly grew concerned that its human might…
Top 10 Reasons To Move To Alabama
Nestled in the heart of the South, there’s a reason America’s 22nd state is called “Sweet Home Alabama.” Read…
America Descends Into Mourning Upon News That Harry And Meghan Are Leaving
U.S. — The United States of America plunged into collective sorrow and mourning yesterday upon learning the devastating news…
12 Clear Signs Your Husband Doesn’t Love You Anymore
Relationships are hard work — especially for women. That’s because if there’s anything men love more than trucks, jackhammers,…
‘No, Sweetie, You Can’t Get Any More Lego Sets Until You Build The Ones You Already Have,’ Woman Reminds 39-Year-Old Husband
MADISON, WI — Local wife Tamara Dotson gently informed her husband this week that he couldn’t have any more…
Alleged College Drug Kingpin Beginning To Wonder If Adopting Name ‘Pablo Pledgescobar’ May Have Been A Mistake
HAPPY VALLEY, PA — After being caught in a sting by the FBI, Penn State University drug kingpin Agostino…
Chicago Principal Concerned As High School Senior Only Assaulting Teachers At Fifth-Grade Level
CHICAGO, IL — Principal Dan Naylor called for a parent conference after persistent concerns that senior student Anthony King…
Lindsay Clancy Honored With Planned Parenthood Lifetime Achievement Award
PLYMOUTH, MA — Accused child killer Lindsay Clancy has been honored with Planned Parenthood’s prestigious Lifetime Achievement Award. Read…
Young-Earth Creationist Has No Explanation For Fact That Nancy Pelosi Is 12,000 Years Old
PETERSBURG, KY — A local young-earth creationist is reportedly suffering a crisis of faith after realizing he has no…