Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Music News

Behold: Nickelback’s Chad Kroeger Butchers Metallica’s ‘Enter Sandman’ at Sammy Hagar’s Birthday Kegger
Breaking, Music News

Behold: Nickelback’s Chad Kroeger Butchers Metallica’s ‘Enter Sandman’ at Sammy Hagar’s Birthday Kegger

Chord F. DiscordOctober 14, 2025October 14, 2025

Sammy Hagar’s annual Birthday Bash 🤮🤮🤮 brought a bunch of has-beens, never-weres, and tequila-soaked nobodies to Cabo Wabo Cantina for,…

AGNOSTIC FRONT and DMC?! Is This a Joke?! ‘Matter of Life & Death’ or Matter of WTF?!
Breaking, Music News

AGNOSTIC FRONT and DMC?! Is This a Joke?! ‘Matter of Life & Death’ or Matter of WTF?!

Chord F. DiscordOctober 14, 2025October 14, 2025

Okay, boomer, listen up! 👴 Your favorite geriatric punks, AGNOSTIC FRONT, are dropping a new album called “Echoes In Eternity”…

Danny Schuler of BIOHAZARD Boasts: “We Actually Try, Unlike Some Bands”
Breaking, Music News

Danny Schuler of BIOHAZARD Boasts: “We Actually Try, Unlike Some Bands”

Chord F. DiscordOctober 13, 2025October 13, 2025

Oh, look! It’s BIOHAZARD back from the dead like that one zombie movie nobody remembers. 🧟‍♂️ In an EXCLUSIVE interview…

Jeff Becerra Says POSSESSED’s New Album Will Be ‘Different’ – Translation: ‘We’re Screwed’
Breaking, Music News

Jeff Becerra Says POSSESSED’s New Album Will Be ‘Different’ – Translation: ‘We’re Screwed’

Chord F. DiscordOctober 13, 2025October 13, 2025

In a riveting exposé with Australia’s Devil’s Horns Zine, POSSESSED frontman Jeff Becerra, who, let’s be honest, probably spends more…

AC/DC’s Ex-Vocalist, Not Brian Johnson, Resurrects Obscure Pre-AC/DC Band RABBIT Because Why Not
Breaking, Music News

AC/DC’s Ex-Vocalist, Not Brian Johnson, Resurrects Obscure Pre-AC/DC Band RABBIT Because Why Not

Chord F. DiscordOctober 13, 2025October 13, 2025

Behold! 🤡 The original, the one, the only… DAVE EVANS is back! 🎉 To commemorate a half-century of… well, something…

KELLY HANSEN Throws Mic, Sobs Uncontrollably in Farewell Performance with Washed-Up Band, FOREIGNER
Breaking, Music News

KELLY HANSEN Throws Mic, Sobs Uncontrollably in Farewell Performance with Washed-Up Band, FOREIGNER

Chord F. DiscordOctober 12, 2025October 12, 2025

OMG! Can you believe it? After like, five whole months of pretending he wasn’t already packing his bags 💼, Kelly…

OMG! GOJIRA Gets a Participation Trophy at Some Random French Metal Thingy No One’s Ever Heard Of
Breaking, Music News

OMG! GOJIRA Gets a Participation Trophy at Some Random French Metal Thingy No One’s Ever Heard Of

Chord F. DiscordOctober 12, 2025October 12, 2025

Oh em gee, you guys! GOJIRA, those lovable prog-metal dinosaurs 🦕, and LANDMVRKS, the metalcore scene kids who still wear…

Wes Scantlin Honors Rock Gods (R.I.P.) with a ‘Firefly’ Song (Please Hold Your Applause)
Breaking, Music News

Wes Scantlin Honors Rock Gods (R.I.P.) with a ‘Firefly’ Song (Please Hold Your Applause)

Chord F. DiscordOctober 11, 2025October 11, 2025

Ah, yes, the musical geniuses 🧠 behind PUDDLE OF MUDD, those purveyors of sonic brilliance, have graced us with a…

Sirenia Drops New Single ‘Nightside Den’ from the Totally-Not-Mushroom-Themed ‘Amanita Messis’ Album
Breaking, Music News

Sirenia Drops New Single ‘Nightside Den’ from the Totally-Not-Mushroom-Themed ‘Amanita Messis’ Album

Chord F. DiscordOctober 11, 2025October 11, 2025

Alright, buckle up buttercups 🙄! Those symphonic metal maestros, SIRENIA, are back with “Nightside Den”, which they claim is the…

IAN WATKINS of LOSERPROPHETS Fame Kicks the Bucket at 48 After a Prison Shanking, RIP Bozo
Breaking, Music News

IAN WATKINS of LOSERPROPHETS Fame Kicks the Bucket at 48 After a Prison Shanking, RIP Bozo

Chord F. DiscordOctober 11, 2025October 11, 2025

Oh, dear! Apparently, according to The Sun (because who else would report this?), former LOSTPROPHETS front”man,” Ian Watkins, has, like,…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 144 145 146 … 196 Next

Latest posts

  • Hollies Classic Lineup Ends As Last Two Members Retire
  • Nickelback Drops New Single Leave Me Behind Now
  • Michael Jackson Sequel to Address Child Abuse Allegations Head On
  • Bad Bunny Denied Nearly 500000 in Legal Fees in Sample Case
  • Dad Movie Debuts Plus Lady Whistledown Binges The Sopranos

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.