Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Music News

Pete Koller Claims Lou Koller Finally Sheds 70 Pounds of Tumor Weight
Breaking, Music News

Pete Koller Claims Lou Koller Finally Sheds 70 Pounds of Tumor Weight

Chord F. DiscordDecember 23, 2025December 23, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: Lou Koller’s Esophagus is Having a Midlife Crisis and Started a Tumor Cult 🚨 šŸ˜±šŸ”āž”ļøšŸ¦  In a plot…

PAUL DI’ANNO Left Us a Live Album Because Apparently Dying Wasn’t Enough Drama
Breaking, Music News

PAUL DI’ANNO Left Us a Live Album Because Apparently Dying Wasn’t Enough Drama

Chord F. DiscordDecember 22, 2025December 22, 2025

The Metal Messiah’s Posthumous Encore: Paul Di’Anno’s Ghost Band Drops Live Album from Beyond the Grave šŸŽ¤āš°ļø In a move…

AGNOSTIC FRONT’s ROGER MIRET Ignores Critics Like His Neighbor’s BBQ Smoke—Just Pretends It Doesn’t Exist
Breaking, Music News

AGNOSTIC FRONT’s ROGER MIRET Ignores Critics Like His Neighbor’s BBQ Smoke—Just Pretends It Doesn’t Exist

Chord F. DiscordDecember 22, 2025December 22, 2025

šŸŽøšŸ”„ In a shocking turn of events that absolutely NO ONE saw coming (except literally everyone with ears), AGNOSTIC FRONT’s…

WITHERING SCORN’s New Album: All Done, Just Like Your Last Relationship
Breaking, Music News

WITHERING SCORN’s New Album: All Done, Just Like Your Last Relationship

Chord F. DiscordDecember 22, 2025December 22, 2025

šŸŽø METAL DRUMMER’S NEW BAND FINALLY FINISHES SECOND ALBUM AFTER OMITTING ‘TOO COMMERCIAL’ TRACK 🤘 In a shocking twist that…

Watch: JOHN BUSH Brings His ANTHRAX Celebration Show To St. Charles, Illinois (And No, It’s Not a Disease Outbreak)
Breaking, Music News

Watch: JOHN BUSH Brings His ANTHRAX Celebration Show To St. Charles, Illinois (And No, It’s Not a Disease Outbreak)

Chord F. DiscordDecember 21, 2025December 21, 2025

When Metal Legends Decide to Reboot Their Greatest Hits Like a Nostalgia-Packed Netflix Series So there I was, minding my…

Watch: Original BULLETBOYS Lineup Finally Stops Avoiding Each Other Long Enough to Play a Gig
Breaking, Music News

Watch: Original BULLETBOYS Lineup Finally Stops Avoiding Each Other Long Enough to Play a Gig

Chord F. DiscordDecember 21, 2025December 21, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: Bulletboys Reunite After Four Years, Fans Experience Both Excitement and Existential Dread 🚨 In a stunning turn of…

Behemoth’s Nergal Absolutely Goes Full Santa Mode, Claims Christmas Is Just About Presents and Zero Holy Stuff
Breaking, Music News

Behemoth’s Nergal Absolutely Goes Full Santa Mode, Claims Christmas Is Just About Presents and Zero Holy Stuff

Chord F. DiscordDecember 20, 2025December 20, 2025

Breaking: Satanist Nergal Celebrates Christmas Like a Normal Person, Immediately Regrets It on Podcast šŸŽ„šŸ˜ˆ In a shocking turn of…

BLINK-182’s ‘Enema Of The State’ Finally Gets Its Own Medical Warning Label
Breaking, Music News

BLINK-182’s ‘Enema Of The State’ Finally Gets Its Own Medical Warning Label

Chord F. DiscordDecember 20, 2025December 20, 2025

BLINK-182’s ā€˜Enema Of The State’ Gets a Vinyl Makeover So Fancy, Even Tom DeLonge’s Alien Abductors Would Be Jealous šŸ’½šŸ‘½…

COHEED AND CAMBRIA Drops Festive Propaganda Cartoon Because Nothing Says Christmas Like a Political Agenda
Breaking, Music News

COHEED AND CAMBRIA Drops Festive Propaganda Cartoon Because Nothing Says Christmas Like a Political Agenda

Chord F. DiscordDecember 20, 2025December 20, 2025

Breaking News: Coheed and Cambria Drop Festive Banger About ICE Kidnapping Children for Christmas — Because Nothing Says ā€˜Holiday Cheer’…

Prophecy Productions: Chronicles of Moral Decay, or How a German “Cult” Label Became a Safe Space for Z-Patriots
A Handshake with the Devil: Inside Prophecy's Dirty Deal with Pro-Putin Scum
Breaking, Music News

Prophecy Productions: Chronicles of Moral Decay, or How a German “Cult” Label Became a Safe Space for Z-Patriots

FinnDecember 19, 2025December 19, 2025

Once upon a time, “Prophecy Productions” was a seal of quality. It was a name that stood for aesthetics, atmosphere,…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 36 37 38 … 108 Next

Latest posts

  • “Van Waarden naar Werk because Your Boss Clearly Values Your Sanity”
  • Hoe kan je e-learning nog saaier maken dan het al is en hoe krijg je studenten het minst gemotiveerd
  • St. Butt: The Worst Thing Ever Found in Stan’s Ass
  • Exodus Tries Really Hard to Not Get Sued by Bioware for Being a Mass Effect Clone in 20-Minute Gameplay Demo That Weve All Seen Before
  • Missing congressman still better than any Dem representing me

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
June 2026
S M T W T F S
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
282930  
« May    
Copyright Ā© 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}