Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Music News

Breaking News: MÖTLEY CRÜE Sells Out to Country Music and Joins Forces with Carrie Underwood for Most Unholy Union Since Peanut Butter and Pickles
Breaking, Music News

Breaking News: MÖTLEY CRÜE Sells Out to Country Music and Joins Forces with Carrie Underwood for Most Unholy Union Since Peanut Butter and Pickles

Chord F. DiscordMay 12, 2026May 12, 2026

This is going to be a wild ride, folks! 🎢 MÖTLEY CRÜE, the most iconic rock band of all time…

Nick Heyward Forced to Relive Glorious 80s Hairdo for The 12 Dates of Christmas Tour Because His Pension Fund is Empty
🎉 Breaking News: Nick Heyward Announces 2026 UK Tour, Because You Clearly Didn't Have Enough Christmas Music in Your Life Already 🎄
Breaking, Events, Music News

Nick Heyward Forced to Relive Glorious 80s Hairdo for The 12 Dates of Christmas Tour Because His Pension Fund is Empty

Chord F. DiscordMay 12, 2026May 12, 2026

Okay, folks, gather ’round! 👥 Nick Heyward, the legendary frontman of Haircut One Hundred, has just announced a brand new…

TOOL Fans Rejoice Adam Jones Says They Might Possibly Maybe Consider Playing Some Shows In Vegas If They Feel Like It Someday
Breaking News: TOOL to Possibly, Maybe, Hopefully Play Some Shows at the Sphere in Las Vegas, But No Promises, Folks! 🎸🎶
Breaking, Music News

TOOL Fans Rejoice Adam Jones Says They Might Possibly Maybe Consider Playing Some Shows In Vegas If They Feel Like It Someday

Chord F. DiscordMay 11, 2026May 11, 2026

In a shocking turn of events, TOOL guitarist Adam Jones has confirmed that the band might, just might, stage a…

DEVIN TOWNSEND: ‘The Hardest Part About Being A Singer Is Dealing With Fans Who Still Think You’re Cool’
Breaking, Music News

DEVIN TOWNSEND: ‘The Hardest Part About Being A Singer Is Dealing With Fans Who Still Think You’re Cool’

Chord F. DiscordMay 11, 2026May 11, 2026

In a shocking turn of events, Devin Townsend, the Canadian musician, composer, and producer, has revealed that his voice has…

Win Extremely Overpriced Tickets to Chilfest 2026 and Possibly Contract a Disease from the Porta Potties
Get Ready for the Most Epic Music Festival Ever: Chilfest 2026 is Coming! 🎉🎶
Breaking, Events, Music News

Win Extremely Overpriced Tickets to Chilfest 2026 and Possibly Contract a Disease from the Porta Potties

Chord F. DiscordMay 11, 2026May 11, 2026

The wait is finally over, folks! 🤩 Chilfest is back in the Chiltern Hills, Hertfordshire, on July 3-4, and it’s…

DEVILDRIVER’s DEZ FAFARA On Upcoming Album That Will Probably Save Your Soul Or At Least Make You Headbang So Hard You’ll Forget Your Own Name ‘Strike And Kill’
Breaking, Music News

DEVILDRIVER’s DEZ FAFARA On Upcoming Album That Will Probably Save Your Soul Or At Least Make You Headbang So Hard You’ll Forget Your Own Name ‘Strike And Kill’

Chord F. DiscordMay 10, 2026May 10, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some serious face-melting, ear-bleeding, and head-banging? 🤯🎸 Because DEVILDRIVER is back with their…

OMG You Guys DRAGONFORCE Finally Found a Singer Who Can Scream Louder Than Their Guitar Solos and Her Name is ALISSA WHITE GLUZ
Breaking, Music News

OMG You Guys DRAGONFORCE Finally Found a Singer Who Can Scream Louder Than Their Guitar Solos and Her Name is ALISSA WHITE GLUZ

Chord F. DiscordMay 10, 2026May 10, 2026

Breaking news, folks! 🚨 The most epic band in the world, DRAGONFORCE, has just made their live debut with their…

BREAKING: Metallica Suddenly Remembers They’re Old And Play Very Greek Song To Confused Fans In Athens
Breaking News: Metallica Still Exists and People Still Care 🤯
Breaking, Music News

BREAKING: Metallica Suddenly Remembers They’re Old And Play Very Greek Song To Confused Fans In Athens

Chord F. DiscordMay 10, 2026May 10, 2026

The legendary metal band Metallica kicked off their 2026 leg of the “M72” world tour in Athens, Greece, and we’re…

VENOM Trolls LAMB OF GOD Over Totally Not Ripoff Album Title and Honestly Who Cares Anyway
Breaking, Music News

VENOM Trolls LAMB OF GOD Over Totally Not Ripoff Album Title and Honestly Who Cares Anyway

Chord F. DiscordMay 9, 2026May 9, 2026

Oh boy, are you ready for some drama? 🤣 Because we’ve got a whole lot of it brewing in the…

MUDVAYNE’s CHAD GRAY Suddenly Remembers He Has a Music Career and Is ‘Totally Stoked’ to Maybe Possibly Release New Solo Music If He Feels Like It
Breaking, Music News

MUDVAYNE’s CHAD GRAY Suddenly Remembers He Has a Music Career and Is ‘Totally Stoked’ to Maybe Possibly Release New Solo Music If He Feels Like It

Chord F. DiscordMay 8, 2026May 8, 2026

Chad Gray, the king of metal, is back with his new solo project, “30 Years Of Madness” 🤯💥, and we’re…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 4 5 6 … 107 Next

Latest posts

  • Nicole Lehmann ist offensichtlich total besessen von KI
  • Megan Follows Totally Not an Impersonator Speaking at LM Montgomery Institute on June 27 2026
  • WARRANT’s ERIK TURNER Totally Not Embarrassed That ‘Cherry Pie’ Is Now Associated with Horny College Kids Instead of Just Horny Old People
  • Trump picks loyalist Todd Blanche as America’s next great attorney general
  • Goregrind vocalists🤘 looking for inspiration:

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
June 2026
S M T W T F S
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
282930  
« May    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}