Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Breaking

WEDNESDAY 13: ‘I’ve Learned How To Adapt (By Selling Out)’
Breaking

WEDNESDAY 13: ‘I’ve Learned How To Adapt (By Selling Out)’

Chord F. DiscordMay 30, 2025May 30, 2025

Oh, look, it’s Wednesday 13, the guy who peaked in the early 2000s and is STILL talking about MURDERDOLLS. In…

Kelly Hansen and Foreigner’s Farewell Tour: Will He Cry on Stage? Place Your Bets
Breaking

Kelly Hansen and Foreigner’s Farewell Tour: Will He Cry on Stage? Place Your Bets

Chord F. DiscordMay 30, 2025May 30, 2025

In a shocking turn of events that nobody saw coming (except everyone), FOREIGNER‘s Kelly Hansen, a man who has been…

Vivian Campbell’s Backstage Shenanigans with Def Leppard Post-Bone Marrow: Prepare for Maximum Rock ‘n’ Roll (and Maybe a Few Unexpected Bathroom Breaks)
Breaking

Vivian Campbell’s Backstage Shenanigans with Def Leppard Post-Bone Marrow: Prepare for Maximum Rock ‘n’ Roll (and Maybe a Few Unexpected Bathroom Breaks)

Chord F. DiscordMay 30, 2025May 30, 2025

DEF LEPPARD, those lovable dinosaurs 🦕, have graced us with some “behind-the-scenes” footage of Vivian Campbell’s triumphant return to the…

Charlie Cox Begs for Daredevil Movie, Let’s All Pretend to Care
Breaking

Charlie Cox Begs for Daredevil Movie, Let’s All Pretend to Care

FinnMay 30, 2025May 30, 2025

Alright, listen up, fellow Daredevil stans! 🙄 Apparently, we’ve all been through some SERIOUS trauma because Netflix decided to axe…

Stephen King Movies: According to This Guy (Who Thinks He’s a Critic)
Breaking

Stephen King Movies: According to This Guy (Who Thinks He’s a Critic)

FinnMay 30, 2025May 30, 2025

Oh, sweet merciful crap, another Stephen King adaptation? 🙄 As if we needed more nightmare fuel for our already messed-up…

3 HBO/Max Movies So Bad They’re Good (Or Maybe Just Bad), Watch at Your Own Risk
Breaking

3 HBO/Max Movies So Bad They’re Good (Or Maybe Just Bad), Watch at Your Own Risk

FinnMay 30, 2025May 30, 2025

The end of May usually means a few things: school is ending, work vacations are happening, and there are tons…

“Sinners” Movie: Clarksdale, Mississippi’s 15 Minutes of Fame (and Free Popcorn)
Breaking

“Sinners” Movie: Clarksdale, Mississippi’s 15 Minutes of Fame (and Free Popcorn)

FinnMay 30, 2025May 30, 2025

So, like, the Clarksdale Civic Auditorium was totally, utterly, and completely PACKED, okay? 🙄 You wouldn’t BELIEVE the sheer number…

IN FLAMES Hires Some Dude Named JON RICE to Bang on Stuff for Euro Trip 2025 (LOL)
Breaking

IN FLAMES Hires Some Dude Named JON RICE to Bang on Stuff for Euro Trip 2025 (LOL)

Chord F. DiscordMay 30, 2025May 30, 2025

IN FLAMES, those Swedish purveyors of… something… have apparently decided their drum stool needed a new occupant, so they’ve conscripted…

Crash Bandicoot Flick? Beg Xbox, Says The Last Of Us Overlord
Breaking

Crash Bandicoot Flick? Beg Xbox, Says The Last Of Us Overlord

FinnMay 29, 2025May 29, 2025

Oh, sweet irony! 🤣 Neil Druckmann, the guy who brought us the gritty, emotionally-scarring masterpiece that is The Last of…

“Bad News on the Doorstep” Rolls Into PVD: Prepare for Disappointment, Rhode Island
Breaking

“Bad News on the Doorstep” Rolls Into PVD: Prepare for Disappointment, Rhode Island

FinnMay 29, 2025May 29, 2025

**Oh, look, another cinematic masterpiece 🎬 is gracing us with its presence! Verdi Productions, those titans of the silver screen…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 635 636 637 … 668 Next

Latest posts

  • Tom Cruise Suffers One of His Lowest Box Office Openings Ever
  • Chance Weighs Dropping First Name For The Rapper Moniker
  • Trump Looms Large Over Supreme Court’s New Term Again Obviously
  • Trump’s Charm Fails To Woo Latino Voters This Time Around
  • Baby Painted Purple For Vikings Game

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.