Prepare for Symphonic Overkill and 100% More Pretentious Arm-Waving
Hold onto your taco hats, metalheads 🌮🎸 because Therion just dropped a symphonic metal album so extra, it needs TWO…
Jackal.Today satirical news site
Jackal.Today satirical news site
Hold onto your taco hats, metalheads 🌮🎸 because Therion just dropped a symphonic metal album so extra, it needs TWO…
Frankie Goes To Hollywood – Welcome To The Pleasuredome Deluxe Edition (UMR). Oh honey, they REALLY think we care about…
Wow, hold onto your hats, folks! Boogie Nights, that cinematic masterpiece (or, you know, just a movie) from 1997 by…
Oh, sweet zombie Jesus, ANOTHER Re-Animator release? 🙄 Didn’t we all suffer enough back in the ’80s? But noooo, Second…
Ah, Downton Abbey: The Grand Finale. Because what the world REALLY needed was MORE Crawley family drama. Because apparently, we…
OMG! Severin Films, bless their cotton socks, thinks we’re still interested in Andrew V. McLaglen’s yawn-fest from 1978, The Wild…
Lightbulb Film Distribution, those purveyors of cinematic… stuff… 💡, have bravely announced that a feature-length snooze-fest 😴 about, allegedly, one…
Behold, the PREDATOR 5-MOVIE COLLECTION! 🤣 Yes, FIVE whole movies dedicated to the alien that just REALLY likes hunting humans.…
OMG! 🙄 You won’t BELIEVE it! KISS, those dinosaurs 🦖, are releasing a 50th-anniversary edition of “Dressed To Kill” on…
🙄 OMG, get ready to clutch your pearls, because those Grammy-hoarding, allegedly “progressive” (debatable, tbh) music titans, DREAM THEATER, are…