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Proud Boys Get Free Pass Courtesy of Justice System Again
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Proud Boys Get Free Pass Courtesy of Justice System Again

Big ElephantJuly 11, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. A federal judge, Timothy Kelly, has dismissed the seditious conspiracy case…

Trump Tries To Delay Housing Bill But Oops It Passed Anyway
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Tries To Delay Housing Bill But Oops It Passed Anyway

Big ElephantJuly 11, 2026

I’m reading this article about the 21st Century Road to Housing Act, and folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading…

Trump’s Playbook Now Required Reading For Aspiring Demagogues Everywhere
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Playbook Now Required Reading For Aspiring Demagogues Everywhere

Big ElephantJuly 11, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. It seems like the world’s modern populists have discovered a common…

Jeff Young trashes Megadeth reunion dreams
Breaking, Music News

Jeff Young trashes Megadeth reunion dreams

Chord F. DiscordJuly 10, 2026July 10, 2026

I just spilled my beer all over my shirt because I’m so shocked… not. Former Megadeth guitarist Jeff Young was…

Hollywood Execs Still Clueless About Anything Before 2000 Apparently
Breaking, Movie News

Hollywood Execs Still Clueless About Anything Before 2000 Apparently

FinnJuly 10, 2026July 10, 2026

We’re once again diving headfirst into the rabbit hole of nostalgia, because that’s what Hollywood does best. This time, we’re…

NY Times Fights Back With Sassy Counter Lawsuit
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

NY Times Fights Back With Sassy Counter Lawsuit

Big ElephantJuly 10, 2026

The New York Times has filed a counterclaim against the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC), and I’m sipping my coffee,…

Vance Expands Housing Portfolio With Spare Virginia Mansion
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Vance Expands Housing Portfolio With Spare Virginia Mansion

Big ElephantJuly 10, 2026

The latest news from the world of politics has me sipping my coffee with a healthy dose of amusement. It…

New Air Force One Soars, Hopefully Has Good Insurance
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

New Air Force One Soars, Hopefully Has Good Insurance

Big ElephantJuly 10, 2026

So, I’m sitting here sipping my coffee and reading about President Donald Trump’s latest flight on Air Force One, and…

Bipartisan Senators Miraculously Agree on Something with Trump Administration
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Bipartisan Senators Miraculously Agree on Something with Trump Administration

Big ElephantJuly 10, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Bipartisan senators announced an agreement with the Trump administration to move…

Apple Sues OpenAI For Alleged Theft Of Secrets
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Apple Sues OpenAI For Alleged Theft Of Secrets

Big ElephantJuly 10, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest drama between Apple and OpenAI, and folks, it’s getting juicy. Apple…

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  • Spin of the Day: The Supreme Court allowed mail-in voting to continue unchanged for the 2026 midterms. — 7% Mostly Reality

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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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