Brendan Fraser’s Mummy Makeover: Finally, a Mummy Who Knows How to Mummy
Holy bandages, Batman! The Mummy franchise is clawing its way out of the tomb once again, and this time it’s…
Tag: It
McDonald’s Dishing Out Caviar for Free This Valentine’s Day—Because Nothing Says “I Love You” Like Fish Eggs from the Golden Arches
McDonald’s Goes Full Elitist: Caviar with Your McNuggets, Because That’s What the Economy Needs Oh, look! McDonald’s has finally figured…
Little Dilley Dwellers: The Tiny Terrors of the Town
Trump’s America: The Truth About Dilley and the Great Migrant Hoax The liberal media is at it again, spewing their…
Vance’s X account deletes post recognizing Armenian genocide, proving even social media ghosts are afraid of Turkey’s wrath
JD Vance’s Staff Accidentally Tells the Truth, White House Panics In a shocking display of accidental honesty, Vice President JD…
‘Friday the 13th’ Movies Slashing Back to Theaters on Friday the 13th Because Why Not?
Oh look, it’s been so long since Jason Voorhees graced our screens that the last Friday the 13th reboot is…
MASTERPLAN Drops ‘Chase The Light’ Single From Upcoming ‘Metalmorphosis’ Album – Because Apparently, Metal Needs a Glow-Up
After what feels like an eternity (okay, 12 years), German power metal veterans Masterplan are finally gracing us with a…
Helldivers 2: Machinery of Oppression Crashes the Bots’ House Party!
Oh, sweet merciful democracy, what fresh hell is this? Helldivers 2’s social media team decided to spice things up this…
Trump’s 2000s Wisdom: ‘Everyone Knows Epstein’s Just a Party Animal’
HUGE BREAKING NEWS: Trump Was HERO During Epstein Scandal, Called Cops to THANK THEM! In what can only be described…
Progressive Analilia Mejia, Bernie Sanders’ Bestie, Secures NJ Victory as Rival Throws in the Towel and Orders Pizza
Progressives Cheer Socialist Victory in NJ—Because America Clearly Needs More Marxism! In a shocking turn of events that no one…
Starsand Island Early Access Preview—Finally, a Place Where You Can Build Your Future Without Leaving Your Couch (or Your Bed, or Your Bathtub)
Starsand Island landed on my desk with all the subtlety of a 50-ton combine harvester—courtesy of CGM’s Dayna Eileen, whose…