Lars Ulrich Archives | Page 4 of 4 | Jackal.Today satirical news site

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Breaking News: Old Dude Shreds, Band You Kinda Remember Plays Some Tunes at Festival You’ve Never Heard Of

Chord F. DiscordMay 17, 2025May 17, 2025

Alright, metalheads (and metal-adjacent folks who accidentally clicked on this), buckle up because we’re about to dissect some drama! ARDENNERY,…

Breaking

Kirk Hammett’s Book Tour: Prepare to be Underwhelmed, Columbus

Chord F. DiscordMay 15, 2025May 15, 2025

Alright, listen up, kiddos! 👴🏻 Kirk Hammett, you know, the dude who occasionally steps on his wah pedal in METALLICA…

Breaking

Metallica generously gifts us another ‘Creeping Death’ video from Syracuse, because, you know, we haven’t seen that enough already 🙄🤘

Chord F. DiscordMay 7, 2025May 7, 2025

OMG! 😱 Did you HEAR?! Someone actually FILMED Metallica playing “Creeping Death” in Syracuse! 🙄 I mean, who cares, right?…