Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: MAGA

Anthropic Abandons Safety Pledge Mid-Fight, Proving Even AI Ethicists Can’t Resist the Pentagon’s Siren Song
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Anthropic Abandons Safety Pledge Mid-Fight, Proving Even AI Ethicists Can’t Resist the Pentagon’s Siren Song

Big ElephantFebruary 25, 2026February 25, 2026

Deep State Puppets at Anthropic Bow to Pentagon Overlords, Ditch ‘Safety’ Charade In a shocking turn of events that proves…

Judge Aileen Cannon Plays Hide-and-Seek with Trump’s Classified Document Drama
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Judge Aileen Cannon Plays Hide-and-Seek with Trump’s Classified Document Drama

Big ElephantFebruary 23, 2026February 23, 2026

President Trump Scores Massive Legal Victory as Judge Blocks Corrupt Deep State Prosecutor’s Final Report! In a stunning rebuke to…

Armed Guy Bites the Dust After Getting Too Close to Trump’s Florida Fortress
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Armed Guy Bites the Dust After Getting Too Close to Trump’s Florida Fortress

Big ElephantFebruary 22, 2026February 22, 2026

Secret Service Thwarts Another Woke Attempt to Sabotage Trump’s Florida Fortress In what can only be described as another desperate…

US Economy Crawls at Snail’s Pace in Q4: Growth Slumps to a Whopping 1.4% – Someone Call the EMTs!
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

US Economy Crawls at Snail’s Pace in Q4: Growth Slumps to a Whopping 1.4% – Someone Call the EMTs!

Big ElephantFebruary 20, 2026February 20, 2026

GDP Growth Slows in 2025, but Don’t Blame Trump—Blame the Swamp! In a shocking turn of events, the U.S. economy…

Trump’s White House Ballroom: Where the Only Fast-Track Is the Dance Floor, Not the Constitution!
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s White House Ballroom: Where the Only Fast-Track Is the Dance Floor, Not the Constitution!

Big ElephantFebruary 19, 2026February 19, 2026

Trump’s East Wing Ballroom Plan Zooms Past Bureaucratic Bullcrap The Deep State’s “independent” art committee just rubber-stamped President Trump’s East…

Mikaël Kingsbury Finally Grabs Gold for Canada, Because Apparently They Needed Someone to Break the Ice First
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Mikaël Kingsbury Finally Grabs Gold for Canada, Because Apparently They Needed Someone to Break the Ice First

Big ElephantFebruary 17, 2026February 17, 2026

Breaking News: Liberal Snowflakes Can’t Handle Mikaël Kingsbury’s Patriotic Gold Medal In yet another stunning display of American exceptionalism (well,…

States Prep to Hijack Supreme Court’s Redistricting Ruling as Midterms Clock Ticks Down
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

States Prep to Hijack Supreme Court’s Redistricting Ruling as Midterms Clock Ticks Down

Big ElephantFebruary 14, 2026February 14, 2026

Deep State Plot to Kill Voting Rights Act! Liberal Judges Trying to Rig Elections for Democrats! Hold onto your MAGA…

5 Things to Know for Feb. 13: DHS Shutdown, Minnesota Surge Over, Nancy Guthrie, Epstein Fallout, Climate (Because Apparently, the World Still Exists)
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

5 Things to Know for Feb. 13: DHS Shutdown, Minnesota Surge Over, Nancy Guthrie, Epstein Fallout, Climate (Because Apparently, the World Still Exists)

Big ElephantFebruary 13, 2026February 13, 2026

It’s Friday the 13th, when even sensible Americans might knock on wood just in case. While the Left will blame…

Oh look, turns out Trump’s tariffs are just a fancy way of making Americans pay for their own wallets to be lighter!
The Tariffs Are Working! Oh Wait, They're Not
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Oh look, turns out Trump’s tariffs are just a fancy way of making Americans pay for their own wallets to be lighter!

Big ElephantFebruary 12, 2026February 12, 2026

Well, well, well, look who’s finally admitting what we’ve known all along! The deep state at the Federal Reserve Bank…

5 things to know for Feb. 12: Canada shooting, Nancy Guthrie, Airspace closure, Funding impasse, Olympic athlete disqualified | CNN
5 Things: Trump Delivers Another Flawless Day While America Remains Safe
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

5 things to know for Feb. 12: Canada shooting, Nancy Guthrie, Airspace closure, Funding impasse, Olympic athlete disqualified | CNN

Big ElephantFebruary 12, 2026February 12, 2026

In a stunning display of leadership, President Trump has once again proven that America is in the best possible hands.…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 66 67 68 … 125 Next

Latest posts

  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Donald Trump posts on Truth Social on July 12 2026
  • Mitch McConnell Takes a Tumble and a Hospital Trip Apparently
  • Queen Needs Brian May’s Permission To Exist Again Somehow
  • Disney’s Latest Soulless Cash Grab Underperforms At The Box Office Somehow
  • The Pretty Reckless in Charlotte, NC(07/12/2026)

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
July 2026
S M T W T F S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  
« Jun    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}