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Tag: MAGA

Virginia’s Election: Will Democracy Survive (or Just Get Day-Drunk Again)
Elephant Reads CNN

Virginia’s Election: Will Democracy Survive (or Just Get Day-Drunk Again)

Big ElephantNovember 5, 2025November 5, 2025

CNN’s John King points at a map like he knows something. Spoiler alert: he doesn’t. It’s Virginia, folks, ground zero…

UPS Plane Does a Funny Dive Near Louisville Airport, According to Some Guy | CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

UPS Plane Does a Funny Dive Near Louisville Airport, According to Some Guy | CNN

Big ElephantNovember 4, 2025November 4, 2025

Another day, another disaster, folks! This time, a UPS plane conveniently crashes near Louisville. Coincidence? I think NOT! Probably carrying…

5 whole questions about the Michigan Terror Plot Arrests (as if anyone cares)
Elephant Reads CNN

5 whole questions about the Michigan Terror Plot Arrests (as if anyone cares)

Big ElephantNovember 4, 2025November 4, 2025

Another day, another foiled terrorist plot, and guess where? Michigan! You know, that state that’s been trying to sneakily turn…

‘Border Patrol Officer Gets Sandwiched Between a Rock and a Hard Lunch in DC, Claims Onion Breath’
Elephant Reads CNN

‘Border Patrol Officer Gets Sandwiched Between a Rock and a Hard Lunch in DC, Claims Onion Breath’

Big ElephantNovember 4, 2025November 4, 2025

Here we go again, folks! Another snowflake meltdown in our nation’s capital. This time, it’s a “resistance” fighter using a…

Dick Cheney’s Doc Spills the Tea: How to Keep a Veep Running (Even When He’s Got More Wires Than a Robot) | CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

Dick Cheney’s Doc Spills the Tea: How to Keep a Veep Running (Even When He’s Got More Wires Than a Robot) | CNN

Big ElephantNovember 4, 2025November 4, 2025

Oh, the Deep State mourns! Dick Cheney, the man who knew where the bodies were buried (probably literally), has finally…

“Thanks, Obama! Why Your Healthcare Costs Are Now Higher Than Your Rent”
Elephant Reads CNN

“Thanks, Obama! Why Your Healthcare Costs Are Now Higher Than Your Rent”

Big ElephantNovember 4, 2025November 3, 2025

Oh, look, CNN is *shocked* that Obamacare is a disaster! Who could have possibly foreseen that a government takeover of…

“Mass Murderer Gets Free Housing and Dies of Old Age, What a Joke”
Elephant Reads CNN

“Mass Murderer Gets Free Housing and Dies of Old Age, What a Joke”

Big ElephantNovember 3, 2025November 3, 2025

Another day, another socialist bites the dust! George Banks, a mass murderer who probably voted Democrat, finally kicked the bucket…

SBF’s Redemption Tour: From Crypto King to Trump’s Court Jester
Elephant Reads CNN

SBF’s Redemption Tour: From Crypto King to Trump’s Court Jester

Big ElephantNovember 3, 2025November 3, 2025

Another day, another Deep State plot foiled by our glorious President Trump! This time, it’s the case of Sam Bankman-Fried,…

Justice Department Says Trump Doesn’t Need Your Permission to Blow Up Imaginary Drug Boats, Congress Cries About It
Elephant Reads CNN

Justice Department Says Trump Doesn’t Need Your Permission to Blow Up Imaginary Drug Boats, Congress Cries About It

Big ElephantNovember 2, 2025November 2, 2025

Folks, can you believe this? Our glorious President Trump, in his infinite wisdom, is taking out the trash – literally!…

Trump, Savior of ‘Dilbert,’ Declares ‘I’m On It,’ Because Cartoonists are People Too, Maybe
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump, Savior of ‘Dilbert,’ Declares ‘I’m On It,’ Because Cartoonists are People Too, Maybe

Big ElephantNovember 2, 2025November 2, 2025

Another day, another example of President Trump MAGA-ing his way through the swamp! This time, he’s stepping in to help…

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