Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: movie

“Shadow Force”: More like “Shadow Farts,” am I right? 💨🎬😂
Breaking

“Shadow Force”: More like “Shadow Farts,” am I right? 💨🎬😂

FinnMay 10, 2025May 10, 2025

So, “Shadow Force” got a 6.5/10? 🤔 That’s like getting a participation trophy in the Olympics. But hey, at least…

Oh great, more celebrities desperately trying to stay relevant at Game Con Canada 2025 🙄🎮💸
Breaking

Oh great, more celebrities desperately trying to stay relevant at Game Con Canada 2025 🙄🎮💸

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 10, 2025May 10, 2025

Alright, gamers, hold onto your Mountain Dew-soaked hats because Game Con Canada is BACK! 🎉 And guess what? They’ve managed…

Oh great, another year of Disney Lorcana, are we sure this TCG isn’t just printing money and dreams 😴 for the Mouse? 🐭💸
Breaking

Oh great, another year of Disney Lorcana, are we sure this TCG isn’t just printing money and dreams 😴 for the Mouse? 🐭💸

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 7, 2025May 7, 2025

OMG, Ravensburger is STILL trying to make *Lorcana* happen? 🤣 You’d think after two whole years of overpriced cardboard and…

Thunderbolts: Oh Honey, They’re Totally “The New Avengers” 😉 (Bless Their Hearts 🙄)
Breaking

Thunderbolts: Oh Honey, They’re Totally “The New Avengers” 😉 (Bless Their Hearts 🙄)

FinnMay 6, 2025May 7, 2025

Marvel, in their infinite wisdom (or lack thereof 🤡), has pulled the ultimate rug-pull! Remember ‘Thunderbolts*’? Yeah, well, scratch that!…

Grand Theft Auto VI Trailer: Florida Simulator 2077 looks like my retirement plan, except with more explosions and less shuffleboard 🌴👵💥
Breaking

Grand Theft Auto VI Trailer: Florida Simulator 2077 looks like my retirement plan, except with more explosions and less shuffleboard 🌴👵💥

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 6, 2025May 6, 2025

OMG! Rockstar DELAYS GTA VI AGAIN! 😱 Is this the end of gaming as we know it?! Okay, okay, calm…

OMG! 🙄 Did Gran Turismo spontaneously combust 🔥 or did y’all just REALLY dig up Grandpa Oblivion 👴 from the bargain bin? 🤣
Breaking

OMG! 🙄 Did Gran Turismo spontaneously combust 🔥 or did y’all just REALLY dig up Grandpa Oblivion 👴 from the bargain bin? 🤣

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 5, 2025May 5, 2025

OMG! 😱 The PlayStation Store charts for April 2025 are HERE! 🙄 Prepare to be absolutely SHOOK by the groundbreaking,…

Crunchyroll’s Ani-May 2025: Prepare Your Wallets (and Your Sanity) for a Month of Weeb Pandering! 🤪💰🎉
Breaking

Crunchyroll’s Ani-May 2025: Prepare Your Wallets (and Your Sanity) for a Month of Weeb Pandering! 🤪💰🎉

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 4, 2025May 4, 2025

OMG! Crunchyroll, the overlords of all things anime (except maybe that *other* site… you know the one 😉), have decided…

May the Fourth be with your rapidly emptying wallet as Disney+ unveils yet another “must-see” Star Wars spin-off you’ll forget by May the Fifth 🙄🚀💸
Breaking

May the Fourth be with your rapidly emptying wallet as Disney+ unveils yet another “must-see” Star Wars spin-off you’ll forget by May the Fifth 🙄🚀💸

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 4, 2025May 4, 2025

Oh, boy, another May the Fourth? 🙄 As if we haven’t had enough of this “galaxy far, far away” nonsense…

HallowScreamCon 2026: Prepare for Overpriced Tickets, Disappointing Panels, and Questionable Cosplay Choices! 🎃😂💀
Breaking

HallowScreamCon 2026: Prepare for Overpriced Tickets, Disappointing Panels, and Questionable Cosplay Choices! 🎃😂💀

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 2, 2025May 2, 2025

Time to dust off your Jason Voorhees mask and practice your Wilhelm scream, folks! Screen Masters International, bless their little…

“Another Simple Favor”: Or, How Blake Lively Robbed Me of Two Hours I’ll Never Get Back 🙄🎬
Breaking

“Another Simple Favor”: Or, How Blake Lively Robbed Me of Two Hours I’ll Never Get Back 🙄🎬

FinnMay 2, 2025May 2, 2025

So, ‘Another Simple Favor’ got a whopping 7 out of 10 stars, huh? 🙄 Must be a slow news day.…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 137 138 139 140 Next

Latest posts

  • Trump Racing China To AI Domination
  • Sex Pistols in Houston, TX (09/13/2026)
  • THE ORACLE SPEAKS Donald posts on Truth Social September 14 2026
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Donald J Trump congratulates Shane Lowry on golf win
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Donald J Trump renovates White House during spare time

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
September 2026
S M T W T F S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
27282930  
« Aug    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.