Jackal.Today satirical news site
Jackal.Today satirical news site
Hold onto your grandmother’s ashes, folks, because Florida’s favorite crypt-keepers, OBITUARY, are dragging their rotting carcasses out of the swamp…
OPETH is back, and they’ve got a new video for you, you lucky, lucky degenerates. 🤘 If you’re looking for…
Paul McCartney has decided that simply owning all the money in the known universe wasn’t quite enough, so naturally, he’s…
Alright, settle down, rock historians and clearance-rack goths, because the news is officially out: The Hollywood Vampires are crawling out…
🚨 BREAKING: Bulletboys Reunite After Four Years, Fans Experience Both Excitement and Existential Dread 🚨 In a stunning turn of…
🚨 BREAKING: GUNS N’ ROSES 2026 TOUR ANNOUNCEMENT REVEALED 🚨: AXL ROSE TO UNITE THE NATIONS WITH A LINEUP THAT…
GERMAN METAL TITANS KREATOR DESCEND UPON AMERICA LIKE A HORDE OF ENRAGED BAVARIAN WEREWOLVES WITH A NEW ALBUM CALLED ‘KRUSHERS…
🎸🔥 BREAKING: CRADLE OF FILTH TO EMBARK ON U.S. TOUR, LOCAL VAMPIRES AND GOTH TEENS REJOICE (PARENTS, HIDE YOUR DAUGHTERS)…
So, Keanu Reeves, bless his heart, decided that saving the world as John Wick wasn’t enough. Now he’s back with…
OMG! 😱 You won’t BELIEVE this! THE CROWN, those Swedish death/thrash metal dinosaurs 🦕, are finally calling it quits! After…
