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Author: Chord F. Discord

Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could "play the kazoo in four languages." Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories. Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
DREAM THEATER’s JOHN PETRUCCI Admits Playing Whole ‘Parasomnia’ Album Live Is Super Fun For Him But Possibly Soul Crushing For Everyone Else
Breaking, Music News

DREAM THEATER’s JOHN PETRUCCI Admits Playing Whole ‘Parasomnia’ Album Live Is Super Fun For Him But Possibly Soul Crushing For Everyone Else

Chord F. DiscordApril 15, 2026April 15, 2026

In a shocking turn of events, Dream Theater guitarist John Petrucci revealed that the band’s current tour has been a…

RITCHIE BLACKMORE Reveals Shocking Truth That Most Guitar Players Are Actually Insufferable Humans with Bad Haircuts and a Perpetual Case of Smugness
Breaking, Music News

RITCHIE BLACKMORE Reveals Shocking Truth That Most Guitar Players Are Actually Insufferable Humans with Bad Haircuts and a Perpetual Case of Smugness

Chord F. DiscordApril 14, 2026April 14, 2026

The legendary Ritchie Blackmore, the iconic guitarist of DEEP PURPLE and RAINBOW, just celebrated his 81st birthday, and what better…

3 INCHES OF BLOOD’s CAM PIPES: ‘We’re Gonna Start Trickling Out Some New Music Approximately Never But Maybe Possibly In 2027 If We Feel Like It
Breaking, Music News

3 INCHES OF BLOOD’s CAM PIPES: ‘We’re Gonna Start Trickling Out Some New Music Approximately Never But Maybe Possibly In 2027 If We Feel Like It

Chord F. DiscordApril 14, 2026April 14, 2026

Breaking news, folks, the most epic metal band ever, 3 INCHES OF BLOOD, is back and ready to unleash some…

ELOY CASAGRANDE Totally Nails SLIPKNOT Audition By Having No Clue What He’s Doing And Probably Playing The Macarena On Drums
Breaking News: Eloy Casagrande Reveals the Secrets of Joining Slipknot, and We're Still Trying to Figure Out How He Didn't Get Lost in the Masks 🤣
Breaking, Music News

ELOY CASAGRANDE Totally Nails SLIPKNOT Audition By Having No Clue What He’s Doing And Probably Playing The Macarena On Drums

Chord F. DiscordApril 14, 2026April 14, 2026

In a shocking turn of events, former Sepultura drummer Eloy Casagrande has joined the infamous metal band Slipknot, and we’re…

BRING ME THE HORIZON Finally Decides to Ruin Their Own Classic Album with a Cringeworthy 20th Anniversary ReRecording of ‘Count Your Blessings’ Because Nostalgia is a Cash Grab
Breaking, Music News

BRING ME THE HORIZON Finally Decides to Ruin Their Own Classic Album with a Cringeworthy 20th Anniversary ReRecording of ‘Count Your Blessings’ Because Nostalgia is a Cash Grab

Chord F. DiscordApril 13, 2026April 13, 2026

Get ready for the most epic re-recording of the century, folks! 🤣 British rockers BRING ME THE HORIZON are releasing…

GUS G: ‘I Made The Super Original Decision To Not Join Any Other Bands After Playing With OZZY OSBOURNE Because I Didn’t Want To Be A Total Sellout Or Anything
Breaking, Music News

GUS G: ‘I Made The Super Original Decision To Not Join Any Other Bands After Playing With OZZY OSBOURNE Because I Didn’t Want To Be A Total Sellout Or Anything

Chord F. DiscordApril 13, 2026April 13, 2026

In a shocking turn of events, Greek guitar virtuoso Gus G has revealed that he’s not a fan of being…

BREAKING: KEANU REEVES Finally Decides to Use His Matrix Money to Fund His Midlife Crisis Band DOGSTAR’s Latest Masterpiece ‘Joy’ Because Who Needs Acting When You Can Be a Rockstar
Breaking, Music News

BREAKING: KEANU REEVES Finally Decides to Use His Matrix Money to Fund His Midlife Crisis Band DOGSTAR’s Latest Masterpiece ‘Joy’ Because Who Needs Acting When You Can Be a Rockstar

Chord F. DiscordApril 11, 2026April 11, 2026

Get ready to rock, folks! 🤟 Keanu Reeves’ super cool, totally awesome, and not-at-all-trying-too-hard band DOGSTAR is back with a…

GODSMACK Desperately Scours Craigslist And Finds Some Dudes Named SAM KOLTUN And WADE MURFF To Carry Their Gear On 2026 Tour
Breaking News: Godsmack's Sully Erna Spills the Tea on the Band's New Era 🍵🎸
Breaking, Music News

GODSMACK Desperately Scours Craigslist And Finds Some Dudes Named SAM KOLTUN And WADE MURFF To Carry Their Gear On 2026 Tour

Chord F. DiscordApril 11, 2026April 11, 2026

In a shocking turn of events, Godsmack’s frontman Sully Erna sat down with TalkShopLive’s The Rock N Roll Channel to…

Breaking News: David Lee Roth Randomly Shows Up at Coachella Because He Heard There Would Be Free Avocado Toast and Proceeds to Butcher VAN HALEN’s ‘Jump’ with Some Guy Named Teddy Swims
Breaking, Music News

Breaking News: David Lee Roth Randomly Shows Up at Coachella Because He Heard There Would Be Free Avocado Toast and Proceeds to Butcher VAN HALEN’s ‘Jump’ with Some Guy Named Teddy Swims

Chord F. DiscordApril 11, 2026April 11, 2026

Breaking news: the coachella festival just got a whole lot more interesting, and by interesting, I mean old 🤣. David…

OMG You Guys CORROSION OF CONFORMITY Finally Found a Drummer Who Can Tolerate Them
Breaking News: CORROSION OF CONFORMITY Finds New Drummer, World Somehow Still Spinning 🌎🤯
Breaking, Music News

OMG You Guys CORROSION OF CONFORMITY Finally Found a Drummer Who Can Tolerate Them

Chord F. DiscordApril 10, 2026April 10, 2026

It’s not every day that a band finds a new drummer, but when they do, it’s a momentous occasion that…

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