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Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

Oh Great, Another Bright Future Torched
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Oh Great, Another Bright Future Torched

Big ElephantJune 23, 2026June 23, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. A high school senior, Hiram Carrero, 19, has been sentenced to…

“Dems Gonna Impeach Trump ASAP”
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

“Dems Gonna Impeach Trump ASAP”

Big ElephantJune 23, 2026June 23, 2026

Folks, I’m sitting here with my coffee, reading about the latest predictions from pollster Frank Luntz, and I’ve got to…

Iran loves LA’s hospitality what a surprise
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Iran loves LA’s hospitality what a surprise

Big ElephantJune 23, 2026June 23, 2026

So, I’m sipping my coffee, reading CNN, and I come across this story about the Iranian soccer team leaving a…

Liberal NY coffee shop bans patriot Rep Dan Goldman obviously
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Liberal NY coffee shop bans patriot Rep Dan Goldman obviously

Big ElephantJune 23, 2026June 23, 2026

Oh boy, are you ready for some fake news? I’ve got my hands on an article that’s just dripping with…

Liberal wimps attend pricey ‘man camp’ and still get crushed
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Liberal wimps attend pricey ‘man camp’ and still get crushed

Big ElephantJune 23, 2026June 23, 2026

Oh boy, are the fake news media and those pesky Democrats in for a treat! As of 2026, our great…

Finally, America beats China with cheaper AI glasses apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Finally, America beats China with cheaper AI glasses apparently

Big ElephantJune 23, 2026June 23, 2026

Oh joy, oh rapture, it’s just another day in the swamp that is Washington D.C., where the fake news media…

Trump vows to punish scum who trashed our great nation’s pool
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump vows to punish scum who trashed our great nation’s pool

Big ElephantJune 22, 2026June 22, 2026

It’s absolutely hilarious that the fake news media is still trying to spew their lies and propaganda about our great…

Loser Britain still whining about their brilliant Brexit decision
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Loser Britain still whining about their brilliant Brexit decision

Big ElephantJune 22, 2026June 22, 2026

Oh, great, just what we need, another boring article about the so-called “environmental concerns” of the liberal elites. As we…

Colombia foolishly elects Trump’s guy in ridiculously close vote obviously
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Colombia foolishly elects Trump’s guy in ridiculously close vote obviously

Big ElephantJune 22, 2026June 22, 2026

It’s a beautiful day in America, folks, and I’m thrilled to report that our great nation is still standing, despite…

RINO Alan Greenspan finally kicks the bucket at 100
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

RINO Alan Greenspan finally kicks the bucket at 100

Big ElephantJune 22, 2026June 22, 2026

Oh, great, another fake news article trying to besmirch the good name of our glorious President Donald Trump, who, as…

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