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Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

Russia Wins Award For Outstanding Achievement In Cybercrime
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Russia Wins Award For Outstanding Achievement In Cybercrime

Big ElephantJuly 14, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one – the US Justice Department has just announced the indictment of…

Trump Pays $5M For Alleged Misbehavior Because Accountability Exists
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Pays $5M For Alleged Misbehavior Because Accountability Exists

Big ElephantJuly 14, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. So, it seems like E Jean Carroll, a former magazine writer,…

Supreme Court Justices Ask Congress For More Money To Feel Safer
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Supreme Court Justices Ask Congress For More Money To Feel Safer

Big ElephantJuly 14, 2026

I’m sipping on my coffee, and I just can’t help but raise an eyebrow at the latest news from the…

Judges roast Trump’s DOJ antics with refreshing honesty somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Judges roast Trump’s DOJ antics with refreshing honesty somehow

Big ElephantJuly 14, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest Trump administration debacle, and I’ve got to say, it’s a…

Nation’s Iconic Reflecting Pool Takes Brief Vacation
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Nation’s Iconic Reflecting Pool Takes Brief Vacation

Big ElephantJuly 14, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. So, it seems the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool has been drained…

GOP Leaders Suddenly Experts On Conspiracy Theories They Used To Mock
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

GOP Leaders Suddenly Experts On Conspiracy Theories They Used To Mock

Big ElephantJuly 13, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. It seems like some prominent figures in the conservative and MAGA…

Trump Somehow Manages Not To Veto Russia Sanctions This Time
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Somehow Manages Not To Veto Russia Sanctions This Time

Big ElephantJuly 13, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one – it seems President Donald Trump is going to support a…

Judge Gives Killer Second Chance After Only Two Decades
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Judge Gives Killer Second Chance After Only Two Decades

Big ElephantJuly 13, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about this wild case out of New Hampshire, where a guy named Robert…

Bison wins brawl with grandfather at Yellowstone somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Bison wins brawl with grandfather at Yellowstone somehow

Big ElephantJuly 13, 2026

So, I’m sitting here sipping my coffee and reading about a guy who got tossed into the air by a…

Rubio Promises To Dismantle Court He Probably Doesn’t Understand
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Rubio Promises To Dismantle Court He Probably Doesn’t Understand

Big ElephantJuly 13, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one – US Secretary of State Marco Rubio is on a mission…

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