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Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

Trump throws epic tantrum at NATO, blames US intel for Iran strike buzzkill
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump throws epic tantrum at NATO, blames US intel for Iran strike buzzkill

Big ElephantJune 25, 2025June 25, 2025

Oh, the Fake News is at it again! CNN, still whining about President Trump’s decisive action against Iran’s nuke program.…

Zohran Mamdani: Too Hot for the Hot Dogs, Too Spicy for the Status Quo
Elephant Reads CNN

Zohran Mamdani: Too Hot for the Hot Dogs, Too Spicy for the Status Quo

Big ElephantJune 25, 2025June 25, 2025

Oh, the horror! CNN is losing its mind over some socialist winning a primary in New York. Quelle surprise! Of…

Kilmar Abrego Garcia Still Living Rent-Free in Jail
Elephant Reads CNN

Kilmar Abrego Garcia Still Living Rent-Free in Jail

Big ElephantJune 25, 2025June 25, 2025

Another day, another open border fiasco courtesy of the radical Left! Kilmar Abrego Garcia, a suspected human smuggler, might just…

Rudy and Friends Join Homeland Security: What Could Possibly Go Wrong
Elephant Reads CNN

Rudy and Friends Join Homeland Security: What Could Possibly Go Wrong

Big ElephantJune 25, 2025June 24, 2025

Trump’s got the BEST people – the REAL patriots – advising Homeland Security now! Finally, an advisory council that isn’t…

NYC Dems’ Mayoral Pick: A Comedy Show No One Asked For
Elephant Reads CNN

NYC Dems’ Mayoral Pick: A Comedy Show No One Asked For

Big ElephantJune 25, 2025June 24, 2025

Another day, another circus in the once-great city of New York, now a festering pit of liberalism! CNN reports that…

Texas Track Meet Turns into a Real-Life Episode of ’13 Reasons Why’
Elephant Reads CNN

Texas Track Meet Turns into a Real-Life Episode of ’13 Reasons Why’

Big ElephantJune 25, 2025June 24, 2025

Another day, another tragedy in the once-great state of Texas! But let’s not kid ourselves, folks. This isn’t just some…

Beached Whale: Luxury Car Flambé Headed for Cancun
Elephant Reads CNN

Beached Whale: Luxury Car Flambé Headed for Cancun

Big ElephantJune 25, 2025June 24, 2025

Another day, another disaster courtesy of the radical Left’s obsession with electric vehicles! A cargo ship, the “Morning Midas” (probably…

Lake Tahoe Boat Party Turns Deadly: 4 Relatives, 4 Randoms Take a Dive
Elephant Reads CNN

Lake Tahoe Boat Party Turns Deadly: 4 Relatives, 4 Randoms Take a Dive

Big ElephantJune 24, 2025June 24, 2025

Ah, Lake Tahoe, where even birthday celebrations are now fodder for the woke mob’s climate change agenda. A family outing…

US Security Theater Still on High Alert for Imaginary Iranian Menace, Ceasefire Be Damned
Elephant Reads CNN

US Security Theater Still on High Alert for Imaginary Iranian Menace, Ceasefire Be Damned

Big ElephantJune 24, 2025June 24, 2025

Folks, even after President Trump’s brilliant ceasefire deal between Israel and Iran, the Deep State is still trying to scare…

NTSB to Reveal Findings on Alaska Airlines’ Accidental Skydiving Door Plug Debacle, Brought to You by Duct Tape
Elephant Reads CNN

NTSB to Reveal Findings on Alaska Airlines’ Accidental Skydiving Door Plug Debacle, Brought to You by Duct Tape

Big ElephantJune 24, 2025June 24, 2025

Another day, another Boeing disaster! You just know some tree-hugging, socialist engineer probably sabotaged the plane. They’re all about “safety”…

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