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Category: Babylon Bee

Democrats Delay Kash Patel Vote As FBI Hasn’t Finished Shredding All Their Documents
Babylon Bee

Democrats Delay Kash Patel Vote As FBI Hasn’t Finished Shredding All Their Documents

FinnFebruary 6, 2025

WASHINGTON, D.C. — According to sources in the nation’s capital, Senate Democrats have managed to delay their confirmation vote on…

Babylon Bee Announces $36,000/Month Pro Subscription For USAID-Funded Government Agencies
Babylon Bee

Babylon Bee Announces $36,000/Month Pro Subscription For USAID-Funded Government Agencies

FinnFebruary 5, 2025

U.S. — The Babylon Bee is proud to announce a special new membership option for USAID-funded government agencies which will…

Liberals Outraged As Trump Says Men Can’t Punch Women In The Face For Sport
Babylon Bee

Liberals Outraged As Trump Says Men Can’t Punch Women In The Face For Sport

FinnFebruary 5, 2025

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Liberals expressed outrage today after President Trump signed an executive order this afternoon that men cannot punch…

Sad: With USAID Shut Down, This Ecuadorian Child May Never Know What Gender He Is
Babylon Bee

Sad: With USAID Shut Down, This Ecuadorian Child May Never Know What Gender He Is

FinnFebruary 5, 2025

ECUADOR — In a horrific tragedy caused by USAID’s termination, 8-year-old Antonio Gonzalez of Ecuador may never have a chance…

Quiz: Can You Guess Which Of These Things USAID Actually Funded And Which Ones We Made Up?
Babylon Bee

Quiz: Can You Guess Which Of These Things USAID Actually Funded And Which Ones We Made Up?

FinnFebruary 5, 2025

News of what USAID had been spending money on has caused quite a stir online. But there’s still a lot…

Roger Goodell Brushes Off Concerns About Biased Officiating
Babylon Bee

Roger Goodell Brushes Off Concerns About Biased Officiating

FinnFebruary 5, 2025

NEW ORLEANS, LA — As festivities ramped up in preparation for Super Bowl LIX this Sunday, National Football League Commissioner…

New White Noise Machine Helps Men Sleep By Playing Soothing Sounds Of An M-1 Garand
Babylon Bee

New White Noise Machine Helps Men Sleep By Playing Soothing Sounds Of An M-1 Garand

FinnFebruary 5, 2025

U.S. — Thousands of men across the United States are reporting better sleep after trying a new white noise machine…

Democrats Warn Trump’s Unelected Shadow Government Is Dismantling Their Unelected Shadow Government
Babylon Bee

Democrats Warn Trump’s Unelected Shadow Government Is Dismantling Their Unelected Shadow Government

FinnFebruary 5, 2025

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Alarm bells are sounding across the United States government, where Democrats are warning that President Trump’s unelected…

Trump Unveils Exciting, Never-Before-Tried Strategy Of Having America Take Over Country In The Middle East
Babylon Bee

Trump Unveils Exciting, Never-Before-Tried Strategy Of Having America Take Over Country In The Middle East

FinnFebruary 5, 2025

WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Trump has announced that America will try a brand new, never-before-tried strategy of taking over a…

The Biden Administration: Where Are They Now?
Babylon Bee

The Biden Administration: Where Are They Now?

FinnFebruary 4, 2025

Many famous people drastically change their lives or careers once they leave the limelight and the former Biden administration is…

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