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Category: Babylon Bee

Babylon Bee

Trump Gives Terrorists Gift Of Meeting Allah For Christmas

FinnDecember 27, 2025

    NIGERIA — President Trump has given dozens of ISIS terrorists the gift of getting to meet Allah for Christmas.…

Babylon Bee

Person Who Apparently Hates You Got Your Kid A Recorder

FinnDecember 26, 2025

    SAN CARLOS, CA — A person who apparently hates you got your kid a recorder for Christmas.   SAN CARLOS,…

Babylon Bee

Uh Oh: Wife Actually DID Want Something For Christmas

FinnDecember 26, 2025

    U.S. — What had been a joyous holiday threatened to be thrown into panic, as urgent reports began trickling…

Babylon Bee

Oh No! Russian Forces Invade Alaska While NORAD Distracted Tracking Santa

FinnDecember 24, 2025

    ANCHORAGE, AK — A military spokesman confirmed Wednesday that Russian forces launched a successful sneak attack on Alaska while…

Babylon Bee

‘Do You Think This Is Him?’ Asks Shepherd Pointing To Baby With Glowing Halo

FinnDecember 24, 2025

    BETHLEHEM — Shepherds began to believe they may have found the Christ child after discovering a baby with a…

Babylon Bee

Scandal Rocks CBS News As Bari Weiss Asks Journalists To Do Journalism

FinnDecember 24, 2025

    U.S. — CBS News has descended into turmoil after new Editor-in-Chief Bari Weiss asked the journalists employed there to…

Babylon Bee

Dad Lives 7 Entire Lifetimes Before Rest Of Family Wakes Up

FinnDecember 23, 2025

    SPEARVILLE, KS — By the time his family woke up Tuesday morning, it had become clear to everyone that…

Babylon Bee

Check Out These Amazing Features On The New Trump-Class Battleship

FinnDecember 23, 2025

    President Trump announced an exciting new Trump-class battleship that will be the largest, fastest, and most powerful battleship fleet…

Babylon Bee

Dad Disappointed As Thompson Submachine Gun-Shaped Box Turns Out To Be Socks

FinnDecember 23, 2025

    CLEVELAND, OH — While opening a present shaped like a Tommy gun, local father Fred Reinfeld was once again…

Babylon Bee

New Photos Reveal Epstein Had A Sick Fetish For Girls With Giant Black Squares For Heads

FinnDecember 23, 2025

    WASHINGTON, D.C. — After the latest batch of Epstein files was released by the Department of Justice, it has…

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Latest posts

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  • Get Ready for a Summer of Fake Smiles and Pretentious Book Club Discussions with Kristina Forest’s The Summer Girlfriend

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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