Perfect Day Ruined By People
SALEM, OR — Once again, a perfect day has been ruined by the existence of people. SALEM, OR —…
Category: Babylon Bee
Is This Minnesota Daycare Actually A Fake Somali Front? Know The Signs
Before you sign your kids up for a daycare in Minnesota, it’s always important to first check if it’s…
College Football Player Achieves Lifelong Dream Of Playing In Duke’s Mayo Bowl Brought To You By Duke’s Mayo
U.S. — One young student athlete’s years of hard work were finally set to pay off, as a college…
Exclusive: The Babylon Bee Has Obtained A Copy Of Trump‘s New Year’s Resolutions
It’s the end of December, which means people all over the world are making their lists of New Year’s…
Man Achieves American Dream Of Working Hard And Paying Taxes For 50 Years So He Can Fund Fraudulent Somali Daycares
MINNEAPOLIS, MN — Local factory worker Hector Flintstock has been working hard, following the law, saving money, and paying…
Planet Fitness Offering Convenient New Two-Week Membership For New Year’s
HAMPTON, NH — As millions resolve to briefly get back in shape, Planet Fitness announced a convenient new two-week…
Wife Starts Making Plans for Next Christmas
SARATOGA SPRINGS, UT — Local wife Brittany Spencer was reportedly seen starting her Christmas planning for next year on…
Walz Announces $8 Billion Grant To Somali Company To Investigate Fraud
ST. PAUL, MN — In response to growing allegations of fraud tied to Minnesota’s Somali community, Governor Tim Walz…
The Babylon Bee Announces Its ‘Persons Of The Year’ Awards For 2025
As we close out 2025, the time has come to announce the greatest of all awards, that prize far…
The Babylon Bee Would Like To Inform Tim Walz We Are Now A Functioning Daycare In Minnesota
We at The Babylon Bee would like to let Governor Tim Walz know that we are now a fully…