Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Elephant Reads CNN

‘Bride Hard’ or ‘Bride So Hard She Forgot the Comedy Part’ | CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

‘Bride Hard’ or ‘Bride So Hard She Forgot the Comedy Part’ | CNN

Big ElephantJune 17, 2025June 17, 2025

Another Hollywood Blockbuster? More like another opportunity for the woke mob to sneak their leftist garbage into our theaters! “Bride…

Trump Runs From G7 Like a Toddler From Brussels Sprouts: Sources Say He Blames Middle East (and Sharing)
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Runs From G7 Like a Toddler From Brussels Sprouts: Sources Say He Blames Middle East (and Sharing)

Big ElephantJune 17, 2025June 17, 2025

Another day, another globalist gathering foiled by the genius of President Trump! These so-called “leaders” probably spend more time plotting…

NYC Comptroller Brad Lander Mistakenly Detained by ICE in Bizarre Courtroom Mix-Up, Proving Even Politicians Aren’t Safe From Bureaucratic Blunders
Elephant Reads CNN

NYC Comptroller Brad Lander Mistakenly Detained by ICE in Bizarre Courtroom Mix-Up, Proving Even Politicians Aren’t Safe From Bureaucratic Blunders

Big ElephantJune 17, 2025June 17, 2025

Another day, another Democrat pulling a stunt! NYC Comptroller and Mayoral wannabe Brad Lander got himself arrested, trying to obstruct…

Liberal Judges Get Filthy Rich Writing Books, Conservatives Forced to Watch
Elephant Reads CNN

Liberal Judges Get Filthy Rich Writing Books, Conservatives Forced to Watch

Big ElephantJune 17, 2025June 17, 2025

Ah, yes, the Supreme Court Justices, now moonlighting as bestselling authors. I’m sure their books are just riveting, especially when…

CNN Asks: Was Trump’s Israel-Iran Strategy Just a Reality TV Plot Gone Wrong
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Asks: Was Trump’s Israel-Iran Strategy Just a Reality TV Plot Gone Wrong

Big ElephantJune 17, 2025June 17, 2025

Oh, so now the left-wing media cares about war crimes? Spare me! Where were these clowns when Biden was botching…

X Marks the Spot for Lawsuits: Elon’s Epic Battle Against New York’s Nanny State
Elephant Reads CNN

X Marks the Spot for Lawsuits: Elon’s Epic Battle Against New York’s Nanny State

Big ElephantJune 17, 2025June 17, 2025

Oh, the irony! Elon Musk, the supposed right-wing messiah, is being persecuted by none other than Letitia James, that champion…

Europe Tries REALLY HARD to Quit Russia (Ukraine War Still a Thing)
Elephant Reads CNN

Europe Tries REALLY HARD to Quit Russia (Ukraine War Still a Thing)

Big ElephantJune 17, 2025June 17, 2025

Oh, the EU is *finally* getting around to maybe, possibly, perhaps cutting off Russian oil and gas by 2027? That’s…

Trump Declares He’s Too Good to Grace Minnesota Governor with His Divine Voice After Suspect Nabbed
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Declares He’s Too Good to Grace Minnesota Governor with His Divine Voice After Suspect Nabbed

Big ElephantJune 17, 2025June 17, 2025

Oh, the horror! Two Dem lawmakers in Minnesota got a little scare, and suddenly it’s Trump’s fault? The Fake News…

ICE Raids: Retired Judge Says They’re Just Winging It, Like a Bad Improv Show
Elephant Reads CNN

ICE Raids: Retired Judge Says They’re Just Winging It, Like a Bad Improv Show

Big ElephantJune 17, 2025June 17, 2025

Oh, CNN, always finding a way to twist the narrative against our great President Trump! A “retired judge” (probably a…

Kraft Heinz caves to tin-foil hat demands, yanks “artificial” colors from food, world now ending
Elephant Reads CNN

Kraft Heinz caves to tin-foil hat demands, yanks “artificial” colors from food, world now ending

Big ElephantJune 17, 2025June 17, 2025

Oh, the horror! Kraft Heinz, bending the knee to the woke mob, is stripping artificial colors from our beloved Mac…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 395 396 397 … 406 Next

Latest posts

  • US Military Brings Drones to South America Because That Always Ends Well
  • Saudi Arabia Gets New F-35 Jets Because Peace Is Overrated
  • THE ORACLE SPEAKS: Dirty Leaks About Iran Prove Disloyalty Towards President Donald J Trump
  • Beck Drops Ride Lonesome Album Now Streaming
  • Carly Rae Jepsen Drops Double Album Day and Night Now

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
September 2026
S M T W T F S
 12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
27282930  
« Aug    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.