Category: The Onion

       The Department of Justice finalized a rule that creates a path for some convicted felons to have their gun…

       Luigi Mangione pleaded guilty to federal stalking charges in the 2024 killing of UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson, facing a…

       Whether shorts are office-appropriate attire has ignited an online debate. The Onion examines the pros and cons of wearing…

       RENO, NV—Wincing as he sang in a baritone voice with a slight British accent, local woman Mary Lowe reportedly…

       APPLETON, WI—Wide-eyed and unusually still as he took in the unfamiliar sight before him, local 9-year-old Connor Walsh reportedly…

       School is back in session for millions of students across the country. The Onion shares tips for ensuring your…

       CHICAGO—Basing the instructions almost entirely on a mental map of his surroundings that had seemingly not been updated since…

       Harry Potter fans forced the relocation of a multi-hundred million dollar undersea power cable they claimed would disturb the…

       BUFFALO, NY—Audibly groaning before declaring the event “a major letdown” compared to competitions in previous years, local baseball fan…

       ST. LOUIS—Tearfully admitting that the lifelong problem had finally reached a breaking point, local man Darren Moore told reporters…