Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Alien

‘Predator: Badlands’ Review: Yeah Right, Just Like Every Other ‘Predator’ Movie Ever
Breaking, Movie News

‘Predator: Badlands’ Review: Yeah Right, Just Like Every Other ‘Predator’ Movie Ever

FinnNovember 7, 2025November 7, 2025

So, you’ve probably heard of “Predator,” right? If not, crawl out from under your rock and Google “original Predator design.”…

Oops! Feds off the hook, Judge DITCHED after appeal court HILARIOUSLY steps in
Elephant Reads CNN

Oops! Feds off the hook, Judge DITCHED after appeal court HILARIOUSLY steps in

Big ElephantOctober 29, 2025October 29, 2025

Another day, another Deep State operative trying to undermine President Trump! This time, a rogue Chicago judge, probably a Soros…

Fork Handles! Man Accused of In-Flight Forklift Frenzy from Chicago to Krautland | CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

Fork Handles! Man Accused of In-Flight Forklift Frenzy from Chicago to Krautland | CNN

Big ElephantOctober 27, 2025October 27, 2025

Another day, another illegal alien, probably radicalized by some woke professor in his “biblical studies” program, stabs innocent Americans with…

Judge Dumps on ICE, Says “Let My People Go (Home to Their Sick Daughter)”
Elephant Reads CNN

Judge Dumps on ICE, Says “Let My People Go (Home to Their Sick Daughter)”

Big ElephantOctober 26, 2025October 26, 2025

Another sob story from the liberal media, folks! They trot out a poor, sick child to tug at your heartstrings…

ICE Hiring Spree: 10,000 New Reasons to Question Reality
Elephant Reads CNN

ICE Hiring Spree: 10,000 New Reasons to Question Reality

Big ElephantOctober 23, 2025October 23, 2025

Another day, another leftist media outlet trying to undermine our GREAT President Trump! CNN is now hyperventilating because ICE is…

ICE, ICE, Baby: Suspect Gets a Boo-Boo, US Marshal Needs a Band-Aid
Elephant Reads CNN

ICE, ICE, Baby: Suspect Gets a Boo-Boo, US Marshal Needs a Band-Aid

Big ElephantOctober 21, 2025October 21, 2025

Another day, another illegal alien resisting the Trump administration’s efforts to keep America safe! Seems like this “gravely wounded” suspect…

Trump frees ‘narco-terrorists’ – Is this a new reality show pitch
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump frees ‘narco-terrorists’ – Is this a new reality show pitch

Big ElephantOctober 20, 2025October 20, 2025

Another day, another Deep State conspiracy foiled by our glorious President Trump! CNN, still whining about Trump’s efforts to secure…

Witness the Cinematic Chainsaw Symphony: Texas Chainsaw Massacre Docu-Blast on Glorious Blu-Ray
Breaking, Movie News

Witness the Cinematic Chainsaw Symphony: Texas Chainsaw Massacre Docu-Blast on Glorious Blu-Ray

FinnOctober 20, 2025October 20, 2025

Lightbulb Film Distribution, those purveyors of cinematic… stuff… 💡, have bravely announced that a feature-length snooze-fest 😴 about, allegedly, one…

Rocky Horror: Still a Thing After All These Years?!
Live

Rocky Horror: Still a Thing After All These Years?!

Chuck B. BallsyOctober 20, 2025

OMG! 🙄 “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” at Strand Theater, Seymour, CT! 🤣 Dress as a “sweet Transylvanian” or alien👽.…

“The Predator 5-Movie Collection Arrives on 4K UHD and Blu-ray November 10th (Because You Totally Asked For It)”
Breaking, Movie News

“The Predator 5-Movie Collection Arrives on 4K UHD and Blu-ray November 10th (Because You Totally Asked For It)”

FinnOctober 17, 2025October 17, 2025

Behold, the PREDATOR 5-MOVIE COLLECTION! 🤣 Yes, FIVE whole movies dedicated to the alien that just REALLY likes hunting humans.…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 7 8 9 … 12 Next

Latest posts

  • Alice Cooper Unveils Fall 2026 North American Concert Schedule
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Donald J Trump recommends Darline Graham for Senate seat
  • Legendary actor Sam Neill falls prey to mortality’s gameplay mechanic
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Lindsey Graham Backs Trump Call for Clarity Act to Counter China
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Trump Declares US Guardian of Hormuz Strait with 20% Cargo Fee

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
July 2026
S M T W T F S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  
« Jun    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}