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Tag: Annie

Collins Embroiled In Allegations Of Totally Normal Politics As Usual
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Collins Embroiled In Allegations Of Totally Normal Politics As Usual

Big ElephantSeptember 23, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest drama surrounding Senator Susan Collins, and I have to say,…

Another Iconic Star Gone, Cue the Reboot Announcements in 3, 2, 1
Breaking, Movie News

Another Iconic Star Gone, Cue the Reboot Announcements in 3, 2, 1

FinnAugust 26, 2026August 27, 2026

The week just got a whole lot worse. TMZ reports that Tim Curry, the iconic actor and beloved star of…

Trump Scrapes Together South Carolina Win Somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Scrapes Together South Carolina Win Somehow

Big ElephantAugust 25, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. President Donald Trump just got a much-needed win in South Carolina,…

Because You Clearly Need More TV Shows to Binge Forever
Breaking, Movie News

Because You Clearly Need More TV Shows to Binge Forever

FinnAugust 3, 2026August 3, 2026

It’s that time of the week again, folks, where we dive headfirst into the latest TV shows and streaming series…

Lindsey Graham’s Demise Will Totally Not Affect His Voting Record
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Lindsey Graham’s Demise Will Totally Not Affect His Voting Record

Big ElephantJuly 12, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The sudden death of influential Republican Sen. Lindsey Graham is sending…

Guthrie Investigators ‘Racing Against Time’ While Everyone Else Naps, Says Former SWAT Captain
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Guthrie Investigators ‘Racing Against Time’ While Everyone Else Naps, Says Former SWAT Captain

Big ElephantFebruary 8, 2026February 8, 2026

Oh look, the FBI is finally “investigating” the disappearance of 84-year-old Nancy Guthrie—right before the ransom deadline conveniently passes. How…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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