Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: franchise

Popeyes Announces ‘Five Nights at Freddy’s 2’ Menu: Prepare to Get Spooked (and Probably Diarrhea)
Breaking, Movie News

Popeyes Announces ‘Five Nights at Freddy’s 2’ Menu: Prepare to Get Spooked (and Probably Diarrhea)

FinnNovember 18, 2025November 18, 2025

Okay, so listen up, buttercups 💅. The *Five Nights at Freddy’s* franchise, that cinematic masterpiece of jump scares and animatronic…

Sony Dumps Millions Into Making a ‘Labubu’ Movie, Proving Hollywood Has Officially Run Out of Ideas
Breaking, Movie News

Sony Dumps Millions Into Making a ‘Labubu’ Movie, Proving Hollywood Has Officially Run Out of Ideas

FinnNovember 16, 2025November 16, 2025

Oh, great. 🙄 Just when you thought Hollywood couldn’t sink any lower, they’re making a movie about Labubu. Yes, those…

‘Star Trek’ Finally Crawls Out of Its Grave for Another Reboot
Breaking, Movie News

‘Star Trek’ Finally Crawls Out of Its Grave for Another Reboot

FinnNovember 15, 2025November 15, 2025

🤣 Oh, sweet Jesus, they’re STILL trying to make another Star Trek movie? It’s been a whole DECADE since they last boldly…

‘Predator: Badlands’ Review: Yeah Right, Just Like Every Other ‘Predator’ Movie Ever
Breaking, Movie News

‘Predator: Badlands’ Review: Yeah Right, Just Like Every Other ‘Predator’ Movie Ever

FinnNovember 7, 2025November 7, 2025

So, you’ve probably heard of “Predator,” right? If not, crawl out from under your rock and Google “original Predator design.”…

My Hero Academia: All Might’s Ego Trip Now With Extra Grind
Breaking, Games News

My Hero Academia: All Might’s Ego Trip Now With Extra Grind

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 7, 2025November 7, 2025

My Hero Academia: All’s Justice is here to, like, totally revolutionize the franchise by letting you do what literally every…

Take-Two CEO Can’t Contain Himself Over Mafia’s Future, Thanks to Geriatric Simulator Success
Breaking, Games News

Take-Two CEO Can’t Contain Himself Over Mafia’s Future, Thanks to Geriatric Simulator Success

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 7, 2025November 7, 2025

Strauss Zelnick, the supreme overlord of Take-Two Interactive, has deigned to bless us with his infinite wisdom, declaring that Mafia:…

Overcooked! 2 Nintendo Switch 2 Edition: Still Cooking, Still Chaotic, Still Gonna Make You Scream at Your Friends
Breaking, Games News

Overcooked! 2 Nintendo Switch 2 Edition: Still Cooking, Still Chaotic, Still Gonna Make You Scream at Your Friends

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 6, 2025November 6, 2025

Oh, look, they’re doing it again! 🙄 Team17 and Ghost Town are BACK (as if we asked them to) with…

Five Nights at Freddy’s 2 Drops a Trailer So Bad It’s Actually Hilarious
They’re not just at Freddy’s anymore
Breaking, Movie News

Five Nights at Freddy’s 2 Drops a Trailer So Bad It’s Actually Hilarious

FinnNovember 5, 2025November 5, 2025

Okay, hold on to your hats, folks, because Blumhouse, those masterminds behind such cinematic triumphs as… well, some horror movies,…

Brendan Fraser and Rachel Weisz: Back for More Bandages and Bad Decisions
Breaking, Movie News

Brendan Fraser and Rachel Weisz: Back for More Bandages and Bad Decisions

FinnNovember 4, 2025November 4, 2025

OMG 😱! Are you serious?! Another Mummy movie? Starring BRENDAN FRASER 👴 and RACHEL WEISZ 👵?! It’s like Universal Pictures…

Now You See Me: Now You Don’t – Prepare to be Underwhelmed
Breaking, Movie News

Now You See Me: Now You Don’t – Prepare to be Underwhelmed

FinnNovember 3, 2025November 3, 2025

Oh great, another “Now You See Me” movie. 🙄 Because we DEFINITELY needed more of these cinematic masterpieces. Jesse Eisenberg…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 22 23 24 … 26 Next

Latest posts

  • Mitch McConnell Takes a Tumble and a Hospital Trip Apparently
  • Queen Needs Brian May’s Permission To Exist Again Somehow
  • Disney’s Latest Soulless Cash Grab Underperforms At The Box Office Somehow
  • The Pretty Reckless in Charlotte, NC(07/12/2026)
  • AC/DC in Charlotte, NC(07/12/2026)

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
July 2026
S M T W T F S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  
« Jun    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}