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Events

WRATH: Fanboys Throw Money at Screen for Anniversar

Chuck B. BallsySeptember 12, 2025

OMG! 🔪 Celebrate 10 years of HANNIBAL’s “THE WRATH OF THE LAMB” at “WRATH”! 🚪 Enter Dr. Lecter’s basement via…

The Last Ten Seconds of Life in Raleigh, NC (09/12/2025)
Videos

The Last Ten Seconds of Life in Raleigh, NC (09/12/2025)

Chuck B. BallsySeptember 12, 2025

Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of Snark,” is a self-proclaimed sports…

Cognitive in Raleigh, NC (09/12/2025)
Videos

Cognitive in Raleigh, NC (09/12/2025)

Chuck B. BallsySeptember 12, 2025

Technical Death Metal from New Jersey Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan…

Super Mario: The Title Strikes Back (And It’s Official, So Deal With It)
Breaking, Movie News

Super Mario: The Title Strikes Back (And It’s Official, So Deal With It)

FinnSeptember 12, 2025September 12, 2025

😂 It’s official, folks! The sequel to the critically acclaimed (by toddlers and Chris Pratt stans) Super Mario Bros. Movie…

Black Crowes Milking ‘Amorica’ for All It’s Worth with “Deluxe” Reissue No One Asked For
Breaking, Music News

Black Crowes Milking ‘Amorica’ for All It’s Worth with “Deluxe” Reissue No One Asked For

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 12, 2025September 12, 2025

OMG! 🙄 The BLACK CROWES, those guys still around? 👴👵 I thought they’d faded into obscurity like dial-up internet. 💻…

Paralysis in Charlotte, NC (09/11/2025)
Videos

Paralysis in Charlotte, NC (09/11/2025)

Chuck B. BallsySeptember 12, 2025

Thrash metal from New Jersey Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of…

D.R.I. in Charlotte, NC (09/11/2025)
Videos

D.R.I. in Charlotte, NC (09/11/2025)

Chuck B. BallsySeptember 11, 2025

Crossover thrash from Houston, Texas Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The Sultan of…

Dow Hits All-Time High, But Some Wall Street Guy Says It’s Gonna Crash, LOL
Elephant Reads CNN

Dow Hits All-Time High, But Some Wall Street Guy Says It’s Gonna Crash, LOL

Big ElephantSeptember 11, 2025September 11, 2025

Another one bites the dust, folks! Seems like the Deep State finally got to Charlie Kirk, or maybe he just…

✨ Pixies at Asheville Yards — Where Is My Mind? 🎸🔥 (Sept 10, Asheville)
Videos

✨ Pixies at Asheville Yards — Where Is My Mind? 🎸🔥 (Sept 10, Asheville)

Chuck B. BallsySeptember 11, 2025

On September 10th at Asheville Yards, the Pixies played a killer set packed with hits. This video captures their iconic…

Sharon den Adel spills the tea: Within Temptation goes full SJW
Breaking, Music News

Sharon den Adel spills the tea: Within Temptation goes full SJW

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 11, 2025September 11, 2025

In an August 2025 interview with Germany’s Rock Antenne, Sharon Den Adel of Dutch metallers WITHIN TEMPTATION, known for their…

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Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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