Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: movie news

Dune 3: Electric Boogaloo—Still Not ‘Dune Messiah,’ LOL
Breaking, Movie News

Dune 3: Electric Boogaloo—Still Not ‘Dune Messiah,’ LOL

FinnJuly 9, 2025July 9, 2025

Ah yes, Dune, or as I like to call it, “Desert Power Rangers” 🏜️. Denis Villeneuve, bless his heart, decided…

James Gunn Doth Bestoweth His Divine Judgment Upon Ye Olde ‘The Batman Part Deux’ Script, Huzzah
Breaking, Movie News

James Gunn Doth Bestoweth His Divine Judgment Upon Ye Olde ‘The Batman Part Deux’ Script, Huzzah

FinnJuly 9, 2025July 9, 2025

OMG! 😱 James Gunn, our supreme overlord of DC, has graced us with his divine wisdom: *The Batman Part II*…

SpongeBob’s Back, Still Square, Still Pants-Obsessed, Who Cares
Breaking, Movie News

SpongeBob’s Back, Still Square, Still Pants-Obsessed, Who Cares

FinnJuly 9, 2025July 9, 2025

SpongeBob, that porous yellow menace, is, like, totally a sponge, duh 🙄. Which means he’s basically immortal. Try killing a…

Another Genius Idea: Jon M. Chu’s Gonna Wreck ‘Hot Wheels’ in Live-Action
Breaking, Movie News

Another Genius Idea: Jon M. Chu’s Gonna Wreck ‘Hot Wheels’ in Live-Action

FinnJuly 8, 2025July 8, 2025

Oh, great. Another cinematic masterpiece in the making. 🙄 Jon M. Chu, the visionary behind such groundbreaking films as… *checks…

James Gunn Thinks Superman Needs a Green Card
Breaking, Movie News

James Gunn Thinks Superman Needs a Green Card

FinnJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

Oh, honey, hold my kale smoothie. James Gunn, bless his heart, thinks his new *Superman* movie is about “basic human…

‘M3GAN 2.0’: More Like ‘MEH-GAN 2.0’ am I Right
Breaking, Movie News

‘M3GAN 2.0’: More Like ‘MEH-GAN 2.0’ am I Right

FinnJuly 5, 2025July 5, 2025

Jason Blum, the Nostradamus of cheap thrills and jump scares, has bravely admitted that trying to turn M3GAN into a…

Arnold’s Biggest Paycheck: You Won’t Believe This Cinematic Masterpiece (Spoiler: It’s Probably Terrible)
Breaking, Movie News

Arnold’s Biggest Paycheck: You Won’t Believe This Cinematic Masterpiece (Spoiler: It’s Probably Terrible)

FinnJuly 4, 2025July 4, 2025

Arnold Schwarzenegger, the guy who single-handedly made biceps cool and explosions even cooler, has been in some cinematic masterpieces. The…

Netflix Vomits Out Another “Best” Animated Movie (Yeah, Right)
Breaking, Movie News

Netflix Vomits Out Another “Best” Animated Movie (Yeah, Right)

FinnJuly 4, 2025July 4, 2025

Okay, so apparently it’s been a real snoozefest for animated movies this year 😴. I mean, who even cares about…

Sherlock Holmes 3: Is This Thing Even Still a Thing? Jared Harris Has Opinions
Breaking, Movie News

Sherlock Holmes 3: Is This Thing Even Still a Thing? Jared Harris Has Opinions

FinnJuly 4, 2025July 4, 2025

So, Jared Harris, bless his heart 🙄, apparently has “no clue” what’s going on with the third Sherlock Holmes movie.…

‘Crimson Tide 2: Electric Boogaloo’ Incoming
Breaking, Movie News

‘Crimson Tide 2: Electric Boogaloo’ Incoming

FinnJuly 3, 2025July 3, 2025

Oh, sweet Neptune’s beard! 🧜‍♂️ Jerry Bruckheimer, bless his octogenarian heart, is apparently smoking something stronger than sea kelp and…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 83 84 85 … 93 Next

Latest posts

  • Waylon Reavis (A Killer’s Confession) unfiltered: serial killers, death penalty & cancel culture
  • Stevie Wonder Battles Ex-Fiancée Over 38 Year Free Rent
  • Because Having Endless Choices Is Apparently A Curse
  • Cancer Throws Iowa Midterms Into Chaos Because Why Not
  • Debt Expert Offers Help Because Your Spouse Clearly Needs It

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.