Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: movie

Grand Theft Auto VI Trailer: Florida Simulator 2077 looks like my retirement plan, except with more explosions and less shuffleboard ðŸŒīðŸ‘ĩðŸ’Ĩ
Breaking

Grand Theft Auto VI Trailer: Florida Simulator 2077 looks like my retirement plan, except with more explosions and less shuffleboard ðŸŒīðŸ‘ĩðŸ’Ĩ

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 6, 2025May 6, 2025

OMG! Rockstar DELAYS GTA VI AGAIN! ðŸ˜ą Is this the end of gaming as we know it?! Okay, okay, calm…

OMG! 🙄 Did Gran Turismo spontaneously combust ðŸ”Ĩ or did y’all just REALLY dig up Grandpa Oblivion ðŸ‘ī from the bargain bin? ðŸĪĢ
Breaking

OMG! 🙄 Did Gran Turismo spontaneously combust ðŸ”Ĩ or did y’all just REALLY dig up Grandpa Oblivion ðŸ‘ī from the bargain bin? ðŸĪĢ

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 5, 2025May 5, 2025

OMG! ðŸ˜ą The PlayStation Store charts for April 2025 are HERE! 🙄 Prepare to be absolutely SHOOK by the groundbreaking,…

Crunchyroll’s Ani-May 2025: Prepare Your Wallets (and Your Sanity) for a Month of Weeb Pandering! ðŸĪŠðŸ’°ðŸŽ‰
Breaking

Crunchyroll’s Ani-May 2025: Prepare Your Wallets (and Your Sanity) for a Month of Weeb Pandering! ðŸĪŠðŸ’°ðŸŽ‰

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 4, 2025May 4, 2025

OMG! Crunchyroll, the overlords of all things anime (except maybe that *other* site… you know the one 😉), have decided…

May the Fourth be with your rapidly emptying wallet as Disney+ unveils yet another “must-see” Star Wars spin-off you’ll forget by May the Fifth 🙄🚀ðŸ’ļ
Breaking

May the Fourth be with your rapidly emptying wallet as Disney+ unveils yet another “must-see” Star Wars spin-off you’ll forget by May the Fifth 🙄🚀ðŸ’ļ

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 4, 2025May 4, 2025

Oh, boy, another May the Fourth? 🙄 As if we haven’t had enough of this “galaxy far, far away” nonsense…

HallowScreamCon 2026: Prepare for Overpriced Tickets, Disappointing Panels, and Questionable Cosplay Choices! 🎃😂💀
Breaking

HallowScreamCon 2026: Prepare for Overpriced Tickets, Disappointing Panels, and Questionable Cosplay Choices! 🎃😂💀

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 2, 2025May 2, 2025

Time to dust off your Jason Voorhees mask and practice your Wilhelm scream, folks! Screen Masters International, bless their little…

“Another Simple Favor”: Or, How Blake Lively Robbed Me of Two Hours I’ll Never Get Back 🙄🎎
Breaking

“Another Simple Favor”: Or, How Blake Lively Robbed Me of Two Hours I’ll Never Get Back 🙄🎎

FinnMay 2, 2025May 2, 2025

So, ‘Another Simple Favor’ got a whopping 7 out of 10 stars, huh? 🙄 Must be a slow news day.…

OMG, Marvel Rivals is giving Winter Soldier a Thunderbolts makeover and throwing a Hellfire Gala, because apparently, that’s what the game was MISSING 💅ðŸ”ĨðŸĪĄ
Breaking

OMG, Marvel Rivals is giving Winter Soldier a Thunderbolts makeover and throwing a Hellfire Gala, because apparently, that’s what the game was MISSING 💅ðŸ”ĨðŸĪĄ

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 30, 2025April 30, 2025

Oh, honey, hold my vibranium shield! ðŸ›Ąïļ Marvel Rivals, that game we all *totally* play and *aren’t* just pretending to…

ARC Raiders: A “Hands-On Preview” So Revolutionary, It’ll Make You Question Your Life Choices (And Maybe Find a Hidden Chicken 🐔).
Breaking

ARC Raiders: A “Hands-On Preview” So Revolutionary, It’ll Make You Question Your Life Choices (And Maybe Find a Hidden Chicken 🐔).

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 29, 2025May 25, 2025

Alright, gamers, gather ’round and let Uncle Trollington tell you about *ARC Raiders*, the upcoming extraction shooter from those lovable…

Netflix Tudum 2025: Prepare for Disappointment and Mild Hype for Stuff You Already Knew About 🙄ðŸŋ🎎.
Breaking

Netflix Tudum 2025: Prepare for Disappointment and Mild Hype for Stuff You Already Knew About 🙄ðŸŋ🎎.

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 28, 2025April 28, 2025

Oh. My. Glob. 🙄 Netflix, in its infinite wisdom (or lack thereof), has deigned to announce the official air date…

Oh, no! 😭 Ex-Sony dude throws a tantrum because his name wasn’t big enough on the *Until Dawn* movie credits. 🙄🎎
Breaking

Oh, no! 😭 Ex-Sony dude throws a tantrum because his name wasn’t big enough on the *Until Dawn* movie credits. 🙄🎎

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 28, 2025April 28, 2025

OMG, can you even BELIEVE this?! ðŸ˜ą Some ex-PlayStation “narrative director” (whatever THAT is) is throwing a tantrum because the…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 146 147 148 Next

Latest posts

  • Democrats Scramble To Save Democracy From Trump’s Ego
  • AirPods Pro 3 Now 179 Dollars Ahead Of Prime Day
  • New LEGO Sets Drop for Avengers, Star Wars and More
  • Springsteen Rocks Power to the People Fest with All Star Jam
  • Dave Grohl Honors New Friend Jack with My Hero Tribute

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright ÂĐ 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.