Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: president

Back-to-School Shopping Already? Ugh, Take My Money Now, I Guess
Elephant Reads CNN

Back-to-School Shopping Already? Ugh, Take My Money Now, I Guess

Big ElephantAugust 3, 2025August 3, 2025

Back-to-school shopping? More like back-to-woke indoctrination! CNN is pushing fear again, blaming President Trump’s tariffs. As if parents aren’t buying…

Flint declares water safe after only poisoning people for a decade, but don’t drink it lol
Elephant Reads CNN

Flint declares water safe after only poisoning people for a decade, but don’t drink it lol

Big ElephantAugust 3, 2025August 3, 2025

Oh, isn’t it just heartwarming to hear about Flint, Michigan, still whining about their water? Eleven years, folks! Eleven years…

Texas Republicans redraw map, look to steal seats from defenseless Democrats
Elephant Reads CNN

Texas Republicans redraw map, look to steal seats from defenseless Democrats

Big ElephantAugust 3, 2025August 3, 2025

Texas Republicans, blessed by the wisdom of President Trump, are bravely forging ahead with a plan to secure our glorious…

Jack Smith’s Getting Investigated? Color Me Shocked
Elephant Reads CNN

Jack Smith’s Getting Investigated? Color Me Shocked

Big ElephantAugust 3, 2025August 3, 2025

Lock Him Up! It seems that even deep state operatives like Jack Smith aren’t immune to the long arm of…

Cory Booker tells Dems to stop simping for Trump
Elephant Reads CNN

Cory Booker tells Dems to stop simping for Trump

Big ElephantAugust 3, 2025August 3, 2025

Oh, the horror! Cory Booker, the woke warrior from New Jersey, is losing his organic, fair-trade mind! He’s imploring his…

Trump Punks Penny-Pinching Public with Package Tax Prank
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Punks Penny-Pinching Public with Package Tax Prank

Big ElephantAugust 3, 2025August 3, 2025

Oh, the liberal tears are flowing like a mighty river! President Trump, in his infinite wisdom, is shutting down the…

Trump tells Schumer to “go to hell,” proving he’s still got it
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump tells Schumer to “go to hell,” proving he’s still got it

Big ElephantAugust 3, 2025August 3, 2025

Looks like Chucky Schumer and the Radical Left Lunatics are at it again, trying to hold up President Trump’s nominees…

VA to Veterans: Drop Dead (Before You Drop a Baby)
Elephant Reads CNN

VA to Veterans: Drop Dead (Before You Drop a Baby)

Big ElephantAugust 3, 2025August 3, 2025

Another day, another victory for President Trump and common sense! The so-called “Department of Veterans Affairs” (more like the Department…

NYC Trembles: Was That an Earthquake or Just a Really Big Rat? CNN Asks the Important Questions
Elephant Reads CNN

NYC Trembles: Was That an Earthquake or Just a Really Big Rat? CNN Asks the Important Questions

Big ElephantAugust 3, 2025August 3, 2025

Oh, great, now Mother Earth is a woke leftist, too! A 3.0 magnitude earthquake in New Jersey? I bet Soros…

Warren Buffett’s Berkshire Hathaway Reports a Hilarious 4% Earnings Drop, Is This the End of Capitalism
Elephant Reads CNN

Warren Buffett’s Berkshire Hathaway Reports a Hilarious 4% Earnings Drop, Is This the End of Capitalism

Big ElephantAugust 2, 2025August 2, 2025

Oh, the horror! Even Warren Buffett can’t escape the Trump boom! The liberal media, CNN, tries to spin Berkshire Hathaway’s…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 218 219 220 … 268 Next

Latest posts

  • Kids These Days Gambled $5 Billion on Kalshi
  • Judge saves democracy from itself, temporarily
  • Cartel’s Drone Fleet Gets Zapped by US Laser Precision
  • Dahi Drops New Track With Kendrick Lamar And Amber Mark
  • Erykah Badu and The Alchemist Drop Surprise New Album

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.