Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: take that

Vivian Campbell’s Cancer Back Because You Clearly Didn’t Send Enough Positive Vibes
Breaking, Music News

Vivian Campbell’s Cancer Back Because You Clearly Didn’t Send Enough Positive Vibes

Chord F. DiscordAugust 19, 2026August 20, 2026

Oh no, Vivian Campbell is still alive and kicking, and we’re not sure how to feel about it 🤔. In…

ICE Finally Gets With The Times And Buys Body Cameras
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

ICE Finally Gets With The Times And Buys Body Cameras

Big ElephantAugust 8, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The US Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) is planning to equip…

Robbie Williams Emerges from Retirement Again Apparently
Breaking, Music News

Robbie Williams Emerges from Retirement Again Apparently

Chord F. DiscordJuly 22, 2026July 22, 2026

Robbie Williams, the man who refuses to let his pop throne collect dust, has announced two massive live shows for…

Woke NYC ruins Knicks games with absurd security overkill again
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Woke NYC ruins Knicks games with absurd security overkill again

Big ElephantJune 10, 2026June 10, 2026

Oh joy, oh rapture, it’s just another day in the swamp that is Washington D.C., where the fake news media…

His entire life flashed before his eyes
Videos

His entire life flashed before his eyes

Chuck B. BallsyApril 25, 2026

Damn, the girl didn't take that joke lightly! Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as…

Fake news slams Trump’s genius Spirit Airlines bailout plan obviously
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Fake news slams Trump’s genius Spirit Airlines bailout plan obviously

Big ElephantApril 24, 2026April 24, 2026

The so-called “experts” are at it again, trying to tell us that our great President Donald Trump’s decisions are somehow…

Fake news whines about Trump’s so-called monster
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Fake news whines about Trump’s so-called monster

Big ElephantApril 22, 2026April 22, 2026

It’s just hilarious to see the so-called “experts” and “analysts” trying to make sense of the latest news, now that…

More fake news targeting our great FEMA with obvious witch hunt
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

More fake news targeting our great FEMA with obvious witch hunt

Big ElephantMarch 30, 2026March 30, 2026

It’s a beautiful day to be an American, and I’m thrilled to be living in the greatest country on earth,…

Metacritic Crowns Game Publishers of 2025: Square Enix Steals the Throne Like a Chocobo Thief
Metacritic's Annual Publisher Rankings: A Glorious Parade of Numbers That Prove Everything
Breaking, Games News

Metacritic Crowns Game Publishers of 2025: Square Enix Steals the Throne Like a Chocobo Thief

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMarch 26, 2026March 26, 2026

Well, well, well, look who decided to grace us with their annual “we crunched some numbers and here’s who’s best”…

PAPA ROACH’s JACOBY SHADDIX: ‘I Love The Pushback From Rock Culture Against’ A.I. In Music — Because Humans Still Rock, Right?
Oh no, not A.I. music! Quick, somebody call the Rock Police!
Breaking, Music News

PAPA ROACH’s JACOBY SHADDIX: ‘I Love The Pushback From Rock Culture Against’ A.I. In Music — Because Humans Still Rock, Right?

Chord F. DiscordMarch 26, 2026March 26, 2026

In a recent interview with LA Lloyd (the guy who still uses a Discman ironically), PAPA ROACH‘s Jacoby Shaddix revealed…

Posts pagination

1 2 … 4 Next

Latest posts

  • Alex Jones Gets Discount on Being Wrong About Sandy Hook
  • Trump Throws Weight Behind Darline Graham
  • White House Ballroom Construction Gets Reprieve Because Priorities
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Donald J Trump brings home Kevin Rideout after ten months
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Donald J Trump blasts Tucker Carlson and allies as losers

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.