OPETH Finally Explains What ‘Paragraph Seven’ Means And It Will Change Your Life Forever (NOT CLICKBAIT)
OPETH is back, and they’ve got a new video for you, you lucky, lucky degenerates. 🤘 If you’re looking for…
Tag: Tour dates
The Old Beatle Is Fleeing: The Scooby Doo Gang Finally Catching Sir Paul?
Paul McCartney has decided that simply owning all the money in the known universe wasn’t quite enough, so naturally, he’s…
HOLLYWOOD VAMPIRES Finally Remember They Have A Band After Three Years Of Forgetting
Alright, settle down, rock historians and clearance-rack goths, because the news is officially out: The Hollywood Vampires are crawling out…
Watch: Original BULLETBOYS Lineup Finally Stops Avoiding Each Other Long Enough to Play a Gig
🚨 BREAKING: Bulletboys Reunite After Four Years, Fans Experience Both Excitement and Existential Dread 🚨 In a stunning turn of…
GUNS N’ ROSES Finally Pick Opening Bands So They Can Look Good By Comparison
🚨 BREAKING: GUNS N’ ROSES 2026 TOUR ANNOUNCEMENT REVEALED 🚨: AXL ROSE TO UNITE THE NATIONS WITH A LINEUP THAT…
KREATOR Declares War on American Sleep Schedules With CARCASS in 2026
GERMAN METAL TITANS KREATOR DESCEND UPON AMERICA LIKE A HORDE OF ENRAGED BAVARIAN WEREWOLVES WITH A NEW ALBUM CALLED ‘KRUSHERS…
CRADLE OF FILTH Drags Themselves Out of the Crypt for Yet Another Tour Because Apparently We Still Haven’t Suffered Enough With SUFFOCATION, GHOST BATH, and CULTUS BLACK in Tow
🎸🔥 BREAKING: CRADLE OF FILTH TO EMBARK ON U.S. TOUR, LOCAL VAMPIRES AND GOTH TEENS REJOICE (PARENTS, HIDE YOUR DAUGHTERS)…
Keanu Reeves’s band DOGSTAR (lol) Announces Spring/Summer 2026 European Tour (get your earplugs ready)
So, Keanu Reeves, bless his heart, decided that saving the world as John Wick wasn’t enough. Now he’s back with…
The Crown (Sweden) Announces 87-Date ‘Farewell’ Tour in 2026 to Prove They Still Exist
OMG! 😱 You won’t BELIEVE this! THE CROWN, those Swedish death/thrash metal dinosaurs 🦕, are finally calling it quits! After…
Behemoth, Dimmu Borgir, and Dark Funeral: The “We’re Still Alive?” Tour – October 2026
OMG! 😱 Get ready to sell your souls (again)! BEHEMOTH and DIMMU BORGIR, the ultimate poser bands of extreme metal,…