Gen. Randy George, the Army chief of staff since ousted by Defense Secretary Hegseth, warned of critically low stockpiles of U.S. interceptor missiles two months before the Iran War started, estimating the shortage would last until 2030. What do you think?
“Rookie mistake. You’re supposed to save the life-or-death stuff for the tell-all memoir.”
Travis Bleck, Clothesline Stringer
“I’m supposed to believe someone who can’t even hold down a job?”
Matthias Satchwill, Foosball Statistician
“That’s why you should never have more than two forever wars going at a time.”
Gabrielle Masinde, Weather Balloonist
The post Fired General Warned Of Missile Shortages Before Iran War appeared first on The Onion.
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
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