Burton C. Bell, Formerly of That Band You Kinda Remember, Drops Solo Single “Savages” to Remind You He Exists Next Week
So, Burton C. Bell, the guy who used to scream at robots 🤖 in Fear Factory (before they presumably unionized…
Author: Chord F. Discord
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could "play the kazoo in four languages."
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
AS I LAY DYING: The “We Swear We’re Not Still Canceled” European Tour 2025 (Maybe)
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because your favorite band of reformed (debatable) metalcore mayhem, AS I LAY DYING, is back! And…
Gavin Rossdale’s Lyrical Genius (Finally) Unveiled: ‘I Beat Loneliness’ (Probably)
Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because Gavin Rossdale from BUSH (yes, *that* BUSH) just dropped some profound wisdom on Baltimore’s 98…
DORO, Queen of Leather & Surprisingly Buoyant Seafaring Anthems, Drops New Banger This Friday (Prepare to Be Seasick)
Okay, so apparently the “Metal Queen” Doro Pesch (who?) is dropping a new single called “Warriors Of The Sea” this…
Lou Koller FINALLY Admits He’s Not Dying (For Now)
Alright, listen up, ya bunch of whiny internet trolls! Lou Koller, the screechy frontman of those geriatric hardcore legends, SICK…
Disturbed Finds 110,897 People Who Still Own CD Players on “The Sickness” Victory Lap
Alright, metalheads and casual listeners (we see you!), let’s talk about DISTURBED and their groundbreaking, earth-shattering, life-altering (yeah, right) “The…
Donald Trump Is Secretly Writing Bad Reviews About Taylor Swift, Beyoncé, Bruce Springsteen, and Bono — And They’re Hilarious!
America has a new crisis. Not the economy. Not climate change. Not even the robots taking our jobs. No —…
Breaking News: Two Guys You Barely Remember From Anthrax Sing A Song You’ve Heard A Million Times
OMG! 😱 You will NOT believe what happened! Former ANTHRAX singers John Bush (you know, the guy who WASN’T Joey…
STU BLOCK Begs BARLOW to Save ICED EARTH From Eternal Awkwardness
Breaking News! Former ICED EARTH throat-warbler Stu Block, the guy who left faster than Jon Schaffer could say “QAnon,” apparently…
Bill Ward’s Back on the Airwaves? Oh, Joy
So, apparently, Bill Ward, yes, THAT Bill Ward, the one who wasn’t quite up to snuff for the “final” Sabbath…