HALESTORM’s LZZY HALE Totally Not Freaking Out About Touring With BABYMETAL Because What Could Possibly Go Wrong With That
Oh boy, are you guys ready for the most epic tour announcement ever? 🤩🎸 HALESTORM is hitting the road with…
Author: Chord F. Discord
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could "play the kazoo in four languages."
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
DETHKLOK’s Concert In Milwaukee Cut Short Because Who Needs That Much Eyeliner Anyway And Also The Fire Alarms Went Off From All The Pretentiousness
Oh boy, what a night it was! 🤣 The infamous DETHKLOK concert on Saturday, May 16 at Landmark Credit Union…
THE KOVENANT’s NAGASH: We’ve Managed to Write Like Five Songs Without Losing Interest
The wait is finally over, folks! 🎉🔥 THE KOVENANT is back, and they’re not just playing the same old songs…
APOCALYPTICA’s EICCA TOPPINEN Loses All Credibility By Claiming METALLICA’s ‘St Anger’ Is Actually Listenable
In a shocking turn of events, Eicca Toppinen, the cellist from Apocalyptica, has come out and said that Metallica’s infamous…
Breaking News: Mats Levén Sings Entire Album Without Falling Asleep Because Let’s Be Real Yngwie’s Music Can Be Pretty Snooze Inducing
Breaking news: Mats Levén is a total rockstar and we’re not biased at all 🤘💥! He just played two epic…
Formerly Sane Bassist Ditches ROB ZOMBIE To Worship At The Altar Of MARILYN MANSON Now Launches New Project Because The World Was Missing GABI & THE FLY Apparently
Oh boy, are you guys in for a treat 🎉! The most epic, face-melting, and soul-crushing heavy metal project has…
Watch: Formerly Relevant Musician ERIK GRÖNWALL Whines About His 5 Minutes of Fame in “To Hell & Back” aka My Career Imploded
Oh boy, are you guys ready for some epic news? 🤩 Former SKID ROW singer Erik Grönwall, the man who’s…
Oh Joy, The World Was Missing a Deluxe Edition of Scritti Politti’s Overhyped Cupid & Psyche 85 Now We Can All Finally Empty Our Wallets Again
Oh boy, are you guys in for a treat! 🎉 Scritti Politti’s iconic album Cupid & Psyche 85 is getting…
BREAKING: 80 Year Old Guy You Never Heard Of Until Now Dies Leaving Behind Discography of Bands Your Dad Listens To
Legendary rock producer Jack Douglas has left the building, and we’re not just talking about his infamous studio antics 🤣.…
SEPULTURA’s DERRICK GREEN Totally Not Crying Himself to Sleep Every Night Over ELOY CASAGRANDE’s ‘Shocking’ Departure
In a shocking turn of events, Sepultura’s longtime drummer Eloy Casagrande has left the band to join Slipknot 🤯. We…