Ace Frehley’s Officially an Ancient Alien at 74
Well, well, well, look what we have here, folks! 🎸 Our favorite Spaceman, Ace Frehley, has officially crash-landed on that…
Author: Chord F. Discord
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could "play the kazoo in four languages."
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
Jacko’s Take: Ozzy’s Last Gig Was Basically a Pre-Death Party
In a recent interview with *Rolling Stone UK*, Jack Osbourne, otherwise known as “Ozzy’s spawn,” shared some profound insights 🙄…
Ace Frehley’s Brain Explodes: Life Support Update
🚨BREAKING NEWS🚨: According to TMZ.com, the one and only, the *legendary* (air quotes, people) KISS guitarist Ace Frehley is currently…
KISS Milks ‘Dressed To Kill’ for 50th Anniversary: Prepare for More Unheard Noise
OMG! 🙄 You won’t BELIEVE it! KISS, those dinosaurs 🦖, are releasing a 50th-anniversary edition of “Dressed To Kill” on…
DREAM THEATER Pukes Up ‘Barstool Warrior’ Performance Video From Upcoming ‘Quarantième: Live À Paris’ CD And Blu-Ray (Because Why Not)
🙄 OMG, get ready to clutch your pearls, because those Grammy-hoarding, allegedly “progressive” (debatable, tbh) music titans, DREAM THEATER, are…
Guitar God JOHN NORUM, Still Alive, Still Signs Deal For Tenth Album No One Asked For
🎸OMG! John Norum, the dude who shreds in EUROPE (you know, that band your mom likes), has signed with Frontiers…
RANCID Dumps a Load of ‘Sex & Death’ on Your Ears from the Forthcoming ‘Killed By Deaf – A Punk Tribute to Motörhead (Because We’re All Out of Original Ideas)’
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because the official lyrics for RANCID’s absolutely groundbreaking, earth-shattering, Grammy-worthy cover of MOTÖRHEAD’s “Sex & Death”…
Tom Gabriel Fischer on CELTIC FROST’s ‘Cold Lake’: More Like ‘Cold Turd,’ Am I Right? (My Ears Still Bleed After 44 Years)
In a recent chat with some dude named Alejandrosis on YouTube, CELTIC FROST overlord Tom Gabriel Fischer (aka Tom Warrior,…
Stryper’s Michael Sweet and Wifey Launch a ‘Faith in Music’ Foundation Because Apparently God Needs Help With Spotify
HOLY MOLY! STRYPER frontman (still?) Michael Sweet and his lovely (we assume) wife Lisa have descended from their ivory tower…
Mike Patton and The Avett Brothers Vomit Up New Ear-Bleeding Single ‘Heaven’s Breath’ From Diarrhea-Inducing Collab Album ‘AVTT/PTTN’
Oh, great, more music 🙄. As if we needed another reason to question the state of the industry. THE AVETT…