Sauron-Appointed Judge Rules Frodo Must Return Ring To Sauron
CIRITH UNGOL — The One Ring must be returned to its rightful owner, The Dark Lord Sauron, a Sauron-appointed judge…
Author: Finn
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed "Emperor of Irony," started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
GigSlave Goes Public With $84 Billion Valuation
Read MoreThe OnionThe post GigSlave Goes Public With $84 Billion Valuation appeared first on The Onion. FinnFinn McFrame, celebrated satirical…
PBS Drops DEI, Announces Bert And Ernie Are Now Straight
ARLINGTON, VA — In response to mounting pressure from various stakeholders, the Public Broadcasting Service (PBS) announced the immediate discontinuation…
Report: Honestly, Man You Saw Get Hit By Bus Can’t Stop Thinking About You Either
Read MoreThe OnionCHICAGO—As he drifted in and out of consciousness and glimpsed memories of your eyes widening in horror, sources…
Hamas Gets Biden-Appointed Judge To Overturn Trump’s Order To Release Hostages
WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump’s attempt to solve the long-running hostage situation between Israel and Hamas hit an obstacle…
Long Time No Semen
Read MoreThe OnionThe post Long Time No Semen appeared first on The Onion. FinnFinn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed…
⚖️Lawsuit Incoming! Philly Residents Are Pissed After Recognizing Their City in Avatar: Fire and Ash 🤬
Philadelphia residents are furious after the release of the first stills from James Cameron’s upcoming film «Avatar: Fire and Ash»…
Man With Fogged-Up Glasses Forced To Finish Soup Using Other Senses
Read MoreThe OnionST. GEORGE, UT—With the water vapor causing condensation to form on the lenses and impair his vision, local…
Study Finds People Trying To Stop Financial Audit Have Absolutely Nothing To Hide
U.S. — Amid ongoing controversy over the Department of Government Efficiency’s investigations into numerous federal agencies to uncover fraud and…
Man Arriving In Heaven Eager To Finally Ask God How Many Liters Of Mountain Dew Code Red He Drank
PEARLY GATES — With eternity before him and the full understanding of the divine presence at hand, local soul William…