Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Editorial
    • Events
    • Jackal Research Division
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

Ely S. Parker, the Civil War general, finally gets his permission slip to the New York bar after only 176 years, lol
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Ely S. Parker, the Civil War general, finally gets his permission slip to the New York bar after only 176 years, lol

Big ElephantNovember 15, 2025November 15, 2025

Another Woke Victory? New York Posthumously Admits Native American to the Bar After 176 Years! Can you believe the radical…

NYC Council Kicks De Blasio’s Dumb Carriage Ban to the Curb, Horses Celebrate with Victory Gallop
Breaking: Liberal Loonies Fail to Ban Central Park Horse Carriages! Another Victory for Freedom!
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

NYC Council Kicks De Blasio’s Dumb Carriage Ban to the Curb, Horses Celebrate with Victory Gallop

Big ElephantNovember 15, 2025November 15, 2025

New York, folks, is still clinging to a shred of sanity! The radical left’s latest attempt to cancel a beloved…

Target’s Target Problem: When Woke Backfires Hilariously
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Target’s Target Problem: When Woke Backfires Hilariously

Big ElephantNovember 15, 2025November 15, 2025

Oh, no! Looks like Target is now too woke for the woke! Seems even the perpetually offended are realizing that…

Smerconish on Epstein files: ‘Resisting the urge to speculate is for losers’ | CNN
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Smerconish on Epstein files: ‘Resisting the urge to speculate is for losers’ | CNN

Big ElephantNovember 15, 2025November 15, 2025

Oh, the Left is sweating! More Epstein emails surfacing? You just know there’s a whole cabal of Democrat elites and…

CNN Asks the REAL Questions: Trump, Epstein, and a Very Quiet Puppy
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Asks the REAL Questions: Trump, Epstein, and a Very Quiet Puppy

Big ElephantNovember 15, 2025November 15, 2025

Oh, CNN is at it again, folks! They dug up some old emails from that scumbag Epstein where he badmouths…

Adriana Kugler, Ex-Fed Bigwig, Oopsie-Doopsied Her Way Through Trading Rules, CNN Sniffs Out
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Adriana Kugler, Ex-Fed Bigwig, Oopsie-Doopsied Her Way Through Trading Rules, CNN Sniffs Out

Big ElephantNovember 15, 2025November 15, 2025

Another Deep State Operative Busted! Crooked Kugler, a Biden appointee, caught red-handed breaking Fed rules with her shady stock trades.…

Trump’s Justice Department throws a tantrum, sues California for trying to draw lines that might benefit…*gasp*…Democrats
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Justice Department throws a tantrum, sues California for trying to draw lines that might benefit…*gasp*…Democrats

Big ElephantNovember 14, 2025November 14, 2025

Oh, the Left Coast is at it again, folks! California Democrats thought they could pull a fast one, rigging the…

Trump’s Epstein Palava: A Political Disasterclass
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Epstein Palava: A Political Disasterclass

Big ElephantNovember 14, 2025November 14, 2025

Another Day, Another Deep State Hoax! The Liberal Media (aka CNN) is at it again, desperately trying to smear our…

Isa’s Literary Cult (You’ve Been Warned)
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Isa’s Literary Cult (You’ve Been Warned)

Big ElephantNovember 14, 2025November 14, 2025

Oh, look, another leftist virtue-signaling project! A dead journalist and a “save the rainforest” book? How original! Probably funded by…

BBC Grovels to Trump After Daring to Trim His Bloviating Speech
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

BBC Grovels to Trump After Daring to Trim His Bloviating Speech

Big ElephantNovember 14, 2025November 14, 2025

BBC Grovels Before Trump! Another Victory for MAGA! The Failing BBC, mouthpiece of the radical left, FINALLY apologizes to President…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 113 114 115 … 279 Next

Latest posts

  • BREAKING ORANGE ORACLE SPEAKS TRUTH SOCIAL REVELATION DJT SAVES AMERICA
  • Oh Joy ‘The Invite’ is Basically Just a Bunch of Rich People Trying to Sell Each Other Stuff Over Canapés and Pretension
  • TIM ‘RIPPER’ OWENS Exposes Brutal Truth That Your Uncle’s Favorite Band Is Judas Priest
  • BREAKING: ORANGE ORACLE Declares Gas Price EMERGENCY
  • BREAKING Trump Posts On Truth Social WE ARE DOOMED

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
June 2026
S M T W T F S
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
282930  
« May    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}