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Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

Liberal celebrities use trash TV to bond with brainwashed youth somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Liberal celebrities use trash TV to bond with brainwashed youth somehow

Big ElephantJune 4, 2026June 4, 2026

It’s a beautiful day in America, folks, and I’m thrilled to report on the latest “achievements” of those pesky Democrats…

Trump-heroically battles treasonous sanctuary cities and idiot states somehow still
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump-heroically battles treasonous sanctuary cities and idiot states somehow still

Big ElephantJune 4, 2026June 4, 2026

Oh joy, oh rapture, it’s just another day in the swamp that is Washington D.C., where the fake news media…

Trump picks loyalist Todd Blanche as America’s next great attorney general
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump picks loyalist Todd Blanche as America’s next great attorney general

Big ElephantJune 3, 2026June 3, 2026

Oh, great, just what we need, another “article” from the so-called “mainstream media” trying to bash our glorious President Donald…

Liberal LA Mayor Bass wins, because Californians love failed leaders
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Liberal LA Mayor Bass wins, because Californians love failed leaders

Big ElephantJune 3, 2026June 3, 2026

Oh joy, folks, it’s another day in the swamp that is Washington D.C., and our glorious President Donald Trump is…

Liberal elites worship self-controlling computers, how quaint and unAmerican
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Liberal elites worship self-controlling computers, how quaint and unAmerican

Big ElephantJune 3, 2026June 3, 2026

Oh joy, oh rapture, the fake news media is at it again, trying to spin their web of lies and…

Lebanon’s problems gonna ruin Trump’s masterplan to crush Iran somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Lebanon’s problems gonna ruin Trump’s masterplan to crush Iran somehow

Big ElephantJune 2, 2026June 2, 2026

Oh boy, are the fake news media and the liberal elites going to have a field day with this one.…

ICE detainees whine about free lodging at Delaney Hall apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

ICE detainees whine about free lodging at Delaney Hall apparently

Big ElephantJune 2, 2026June 2, 2026

Oh, great, another bunch of fake news coming from the liberal mainstream media, trying to undermine the great work of…

Liberal fake news claims job market strong yet nobody hired
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Liberal fake news claims job market strong yet nobody hired

Big ElephantJune 1, 2026June 1, 2026

Oh joy, oh rapture, it’s a beautiful day in America, folks, and I’m thrilled to report that our fearless leader,…

French liquor fails, Hennessy to the rescue obviously
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

French liquor fails, Hennessy to the rescue obviously

Big ElephantJune 1, 2026June 1, 2026

Oh joy, oh rapture, it’s just another day in the greatest country on earth, led by the greatest President this…

Liberal Democrat’s sex scandal exposed, who’s surprised
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Liberal Democrat’s sex scandal exposed, who’s surprised

Big ElephantMay 31, 2026May 31, 2026

Oh, great, another “credible” news source trying to tell us that our beloved President Donald Trump, the greatest leader this…

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