Trump crashes Warner Bros. drama, demands CNN be auctioned off like last season’s leftovers
In a stunning and totally unexpected move, President Donald J. Trump, the greatest president in history and possibly all of…
Author: Big Elephant
Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.
Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.
Exclusive: Trump’s FEMA Council to Suggest Agency Slashes – Turns Out They’re Just Cutting Red Tape (And Maybe a Few Redundant Paper Clips)
In a bold move to rescue America from the bureaucratic nightmare of the Federal Emergency Management Agency, the Trump administration…
When Red and Blue Team Leaders Finally Agree on Something: Punching People Is Bad, Actually
Liberal Governors Whine About Political Violence While Trying to Start a Civil War In a stunning display of hypocrisy, Pennsylvania’s…
Instacart’s AI Is Playing Grocery Store Price Tag Roulette and You’re the Human Lab Rat
The woke AI overlords at Instacart are now price-discriminating against American shoppers based on their perceived “price sensitivity” – because…
Kamala Harris Extends Book Tour to 2026 Because Apparently Even Her Memoir Needs a Second Chance
Kamala Harris announces 2026 book tour extension, now rebranded as ‘How to Lose an Election and Still Get Paid’ –…
Prosecutors Serve Up Gourmet Dumpster DNA as Exhibit A in Brian Walshe’s ‘How to Dispose of a Body’ Masterclass
BREAKING: Another Bloody Rug Mystery in Liberal La-La Land – But Don’t Worry, Folks, Trump’s Still President and Winning in…
Your Burning Qs Wanted: Should We Just Hand Toddlers the Internet Like It’s a Glitter Bomb Waiting to Explode
BREAKING: Woke Australia Declares War on Freedom, Decides Kids Belong to the State Now Well folks, it’s happened! The Aussie…
Sheryl Sandberg Wonders Why Women Aren’t ‘Leaning In’ to the Corporate Nightmare Like They Used To—Is It the Zombie Apocalypse Vibes?
Hold onto your MAGA hats, folks, because Australia just declared war on FUN – and of course, CNN’s parroting it…
Bondi Accuses Judges of Running a Mean Girls Clique Against Lindsey Halligan
In today’s episode of “The Bench Strikes Back,” a gaggle of Alexandria federal judges decided they’re not just referees —…
Trump to Host Magical Money Cornfield Roundtable, Promises $12 Billion in Government-Free Government Aid
In a move that has Democrats clutching their soy lattes, President Donald J. Trump is rolling out a $12 billion…