Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

Trump’s ICE Agents to Make Democrats’ Cities Great Again Through Deportation, Says CNN Politics (Satire Alert)
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s ICE Agents to Make Democrats’ Cities Great Again Through Deportation, Says CNN Politics (Satire Alert)

Big ElephantJune 16, 2025June 16, 2025

CNN is at it again, folks! They’re twisting the words of our great President Trump to make it sound like…

Ed Sheeran’s “Thinking Out Loud” Copyright Case Gets Dumped by Supreme Court, Guess They Couldn’t Handle the Groove
Elephant Reads CNN

Ed Sheeran’s “Thinking Out Loud” Copyright Case Gets Dumped by Supreme Court, Guess They Couldn’t Handle the Groove

Big ElephantJune 16, 2025June 16, 2025

Oh, the Supreme Court REFUSES to hear a case about Ed Sheeran ripping off Marvin Gaye? Quelle surprise! Probably because…

“America’s Sweethearts: Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders” Returns to Bless Your Screen (Again)
Elephant Reads CNN

“America’s Sweethearts: Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders” Returns to Bless Your Screen (Again)

Big ElephantJune 16, 2025June 16, 2025

Oh, great, more distractions for the easily led! CNN is pushing “Summer Game Fest Play Days” with “LEGO Party” and…

Randi Weingarten and Lee Saunders ditch sinking ship DNC in hilarious power struggle
Elephant Reads CNN

Randi Weingarten and Lee Saunders ditch sinking ship DNC in hilarious power struggle

Big ElephantJune 16, 2025June 16, 2025

Oh, the Democrat Party is eating itself alive! Two more radical leftists, Randi Weingarten and Lee Saunders, are jumping ship…

Leonard Lauder, Makeup Moneybags Passes Away at Old Age
Elephant Reads CNN

Leonard Lauder, Makeup Moneybags Passes Away at Old Age

Big ElephantJune 15, 2025June 15, 2025

Leonard Lauder, the son of cosmetics pioneers and a titan of the beauty industry, has passed away at 92. Did…

Two illegal aliens who made a run for it from the Newark Illegal Alien Resort and Spa are back in custody | CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

Two illegal aliens who made a run for it from the Newark Illegal Alien Resort and Spa are back in custody | CNN

Big ElephantJune 15, 2025June 15, 2025

Oh, the humanity! Or rather, the lack thereof! Seems some illegals, who were being graciously housed in a New Jersey…

WaPo Journos Get Hacked: Guess Their Passwords Weren’t ‘Password123’
Elephant Reads CNN

WaPo Journos Get Hacked: Guess Their Passwords Weren’t ‘Password123’

Big ElephantJune 15, 2025June 15, 2025

Oh, the horror! Those paragons of journalistic integrity at the Washington Post got hacked! You just know it was those…

Spectrum Blames Fiber Optic Outage on Mischievous Squirrels with a Vendetta Against Connectivity
Elephant Reads CNN

Spectrum Blames Fiber Optic Outage on Mischievous Squirrels with a Vendetta Against Connectivity

Big ElephantJune 15, 2025June 15, 2025

Oh, the horror! Spectrum cable lines in Los Angeles were cut. Vandalism, they say? I say it’s ANTIFA! Probably those…

Cops Still Clueless in Minnesota Lawmaker Murder Mystery
Elephant Reads CNN

Cops Still Clueless in Minnesota Lawmaker Murder Mystery

Big ElephantJune 15, 2025June 15, 2025

Another day, another tragedy, and wouldn’t you know it, the liberal media is all over it, trying to paint some…

‘How to Train Your Dragon’ Remake: Because Originality Is SO Last Century | CNN Business
Elephant Reads CNN

‘How to Train Your Dragon’ Remake: Because Originality Is SO Last Century | CNN Business

Big ElephantJune 15, 2025June 15, 2025

Another live-action remake, “How to Train Your Dragon,” soared to $83.7 million! Can you believe these woke Hollywood elites are…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 449 450 451 … 457 Next

Latest posts

  • Justice Served With Extra Helping of Tragedy
  • Queensryche Still Exists And People Are For Some Reason Excited
  • Tony Iommi still trying to fix Born Again 40 years later
  • Diplomats Suddenly Remember They Have Families in Middle East
  • Spin of the Day: A quiz that challenges readers’ knowledge of recent news stories. — 87% Journalism Not Found

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.