Smoke Alarm Patiently Waits Until 3 A.M. To Announce Low Battery
MACON, GA — A smoke alarm living in the house of a local family waited patiently until all the…
Category: Babylon Bee
7 Devastating Effects Of Ending Race-Based Gerrymandering
With yesterday’s ruling, the United States Supreme Court officially declared it illegal to redraw voting districts based on the…
Mayor Mamdnai Declares Crisis Of Having Run Out Of Other People’s Money
NEW YORK, NY — Mayor Zohran Mamdani declared an official budget crisis in the city after having completely run…
After Seeing Ben Sasse’s Incredible Faith And Character, Nation Understands Why He Had To Leave Politics
UNITED STATES — After seeing Ben Sasse’s incredible faith in God and upstanding moral character, the nation now understands…
Dad Splits Commute Time Between Worshipping The Lord Jesus Christ And Cursing Out Bad Drivers
LEE’S SUMMIT, MO — Traveling to and from work followed its standard pattern this morning, as a local dad…
‘Is It Too Late To Ask Who Gerry Mander Is?’ KBJ Whispers To Clarence Thomas
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Shortly before the United States Supreme Court issued its ruling on Louisiana’s proposed redrawing of its…
Poll Shows Majority Of Democrats Believe Lincoln Assassination Staged
U.S. — The growing rift between the political right and left in the country became even more evident this…
In Blow To Democrats, SCOTUS Rules They Have To Stop Being Racist
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a devastating setback to the Democratic Party, the United States Supreme Court ruled today that…
Trump Presents King Charles With Gift Of Toothbrush
WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Trump presented King Charles with a beautiful new toothbrush as part of the monarch’s visit…
Megachurch Torn Between Supporting Missionaries To India Or Adding Pickleball Courts
FURLOW, AR — Leadership at local megachurch Cross Action Worship (CAW) was reportedly torn this week between supporting missionaries…