The Babylon Bee Has Obtained The Official White House Schedule For The Final Two Weeks Of Biden’s Presidency
The day is fast approaching when Joe Biden will depart from the White House. With only two short weeks remaining…
Category: Babylon Bee
Wife Really Stressed Out After Realizing She Has Nothing To Stress Out About
NASSAU, DE — After cuddling with her husband in front of a roaring fire and getting Christmas decorations put away…
Bill Nye’s Medal Revoked After Old Hate Speech Comes To Light
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Bill Nye has just had his Presidential Medal of Freedom revoked after investigators unearthed an old hate…
Meghan Markle Horrified To Learn Netflix Cameras Have Been Following Her This Whole Time
MONTECITO, CA — Princess and former General Hospital extra Meghan Markle was horrified to learn Netflix cameras have been filming…
Reminder: American Women Have Until January 20th To Find A Man To Get Them Pregnant Or One Will Be Selected For Them
ATTENTION: American women have until noon on the 20th of January, in the Year of our Lord 2025, to find…
Biden Honors Kamala Harris With Presidential Medal Of Participation
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a touching display today, President Biden awarded Vice President Kamala Harris the Presidential Medal of Participation.…
Allstate CEO Explains If Americans Were Nicer, Islamists Wouldn’t Have To Murder Them
U.S. — Allstate CEO Thomas Wilson explained to viewers across the nation that if Americans would act nicer, Islamic terrorists…
Biden Awards Presidential Medal Of Freedom To Skeletor
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a surprise move, President Joe Biden awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom to Skeletor, longtime archnemesis…
Batman Trades In Batmobile For Cybertruck
GOTHAM CITY — Batman has officially traded in the Batmobile for a Tesla Cybertruck. Read MoreBabylon Bee
US Army To Add ‘Do You Intend To Carry Out a Massive Terrorist Attack’ To Application Form
U.S. — In an effort to address recent violence, the United States Army has decided to begin asking applicants if…