Biden Comforts Fire Victims By Telling About How He Once Ordered A Steak Medium But It Was Served Well Done
LOS ANGELOS, CA — In the wake of the flaming devastation of California, President Biden offered fire victims a comforting…
Category: Babylon Bee
Study Finds Every Man’s Deepest Desire Is A Giant Map With Tanks And Soldiers On It That They Can Push Around With Sticks
U.S. — After surveying tens of thousands of men, researchers at the University of Boston have concluded that the deepest…
Newsom Assures Wildfire Victims He Is Diverting Millions Of Dollars To Emergency DEI Initiatives
LOS ANGELES, CA — As the world looked on in shock while multiple wildfires ravaged areas outside of Los Angeles,…
New Check Engine Light For Women Will Show Ryan Gosling’s Face So They’ll Actually Pay Attention To It
DETROIT, MI — As part of a new campaign to make cars safer for women, General Motors unveiled an innovative…
‘This Is Worse Than The Holocaust!’ Shouts Sunny Hostin After Barista Forgets To Put Cream In Her Coffee
MANHATTAN, NY — Sonny Hostin declared today that she had experienced “the Holocaust times ten” after the barista forgot to…
Mike Johnson Calls LEGO To Order Another Set Of Hair
WASHINGTON, D.C. — With his old hair starting to wear out, House Speaker Mike Johnson called the LEGO company to…
10 Totally Based Changes Mark Zuckerberg Is Bringing To Facebook
As though scales fell from Mark Zuckerberg’s eyes, the tech magnate unveiled a set of changes that will be made…
‘It’s Too Expensive To Have Kids,’ Says Woman Whose Ancestors Raised 11 Kids In A Two-bedroom House
VENTURA, CA — Local woman Sarah Carter, whose ancestors once raised 11 kids in a 2-bedroom house, recently told her…
Biden Issues Imminent Terrorist Threat Warning Due To The 11 Terrorists He Just Released From Prison
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a rare televised address from the Oval Office, President Biden warned the American public of an…
Trump Announces Plan To Rename The Moon ‘Space America’
WASHINGTON, D.C. — With a little less than two weeks to go before the inauguration, President-elect Donald Trump has just…