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Category: Babylon Bee

Transgender Mouse Obliterates Female Mouse In Laboratory MMA Event
Babylon Bee

Transgender Mouse Obliterates Female Mouse In Laboratory MMA Event

FinnMarch 7, 2025

LAS VEGAS, NV — Staff members at a local scientific research facility were shocked into silence yesterday, as a transgender…

Catholic Condemned To 800 More Years In Purgatory After Failing To Post Ash Selfie
Babylon Bee

Catholic Condemned To 800 More Years In Purgatory After Failing To Post Ash Selfie

FinnMarch 7, 2025

BOSTON, MA — A devoted Catholic man was devastated after being notified that he had been condemned to an additional…

9 Essential Items France Is Providing In Defense Of Ukraine
Babylon Bee

9 Essential Items France Is Providing In Defense Of Ukraine

FinnMarch 6, 2025

With the U.S. suspending all military aid amid contentious negotiations for peace, the historically courageous nation of France announced that…

German In Jail For A Meme Sure Hopes EU Can Stop Spread Of Russian Tyranny
Babylon Bee

German In Jail For A Meme Sure Hopes EU Can Stop Spread Of Russian Tyranny

FinnMarch 6, 2025

FRANKFURT — According to sources, a German man who was jailed by authorities for sharing a meme is expressing hope…

Apostle Paul Reportedly Shipwrecked So Many Times Because He Failed To Ask For Traveling Mercies
Babylon Bee

Apostle Paul Reportedly Shipwrecked So Many Times Because He Failed To Ask For Traveling Mercies

FinnMarch 6, 2025

CAMBRIDGE — In a noteworthy new discovery, a group of biblical scholars revealed a new consensus opinion that the Apostle…

Mechanic Exhausted After Long Day of Making Up Fake Car Parts That Need To Be Fixed
Babylon Bee

Mechanic Exhausted After Long Day of Making Up Fake Car Parts That Need To Be Fixed

FinnMarch 6, 2025

ALLENTOWN, PA — Local mechanic Ruben Rivera appeared exhausted Wednesday after a long day making up fake car parts that…

Catholic Church Introduces White Ashes For Black People
Babylon Bee

Catholic Church Introduces White Ashes For Black People

FinnMarch 6, 2025

VATICAN — Ash Wednesday in 2025 was the most inclusive ever, say Vatican officials, thanks to the introduction of new…

Democrats Ready To Defend Department Of Education Just As Soon As They Figure Out What It Does
Babylon Bee

Democrats Ready To Defend Department Of Education Just As Soon As They Figure Out What It Does

FinnMarch 6, 2025

WASHINGTON, D.C. — With reports circulating that President Donald Trump was preparing to sign an executive order to eliminate the…

Air1 Runs Another Commercial About How They Don’t Have Any Commercials
Babylon Bee

Air1 Runs Another Commercial About How They Don’t Have Any Commercials

FinnMarch 5, 2025

FRANKLIN, TN — Listeners were in for an unexpected treat last night, as Christian radio network Air1 unveiled another commercial…

Report: TobyMac Still Doing His Thing
Babylon Bee

Report: TobyMac Still Doing His Thing

FinnMarch 5, 2025

U.S. — According to sources, DC Talk founder and 2004 Dove Award-winning solo artist Toby Mac is still out there,…

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