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Category: Babylon Bee

Biden Honors Kamala Harris With Presidential Medal Of Participation
Babylon Bee

Biden Honors Kamala Harris With Presidential Medal Of Participation

January 5, 2025

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a touching display today, President Biden awarded Vice President Kamala Harris the Presidential Medal of Participation.…

Allstate CEO Explains If Americans Were Nicer, Islamists Wouldn’t Have To Murder Them
Babylon Bee

Allstate CEO Explains If Americans Were Nicer, Islamists Wouldn’t Have To Murder Them

January 5, 2025

U.S. — Allstate CEO Thomas Wilson explained to viewers across the nation that if Americans would act nicer, Islamic terrorists…

Biden Awards Presidential Medal Of Freedom To Skeletor
Babylon Bee

Biden Awards Presidential Medal Of Freedom To Skeletor

January 4, 2025

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a surprise move, President Joe Biden awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom to Skeletor, longtime archnemesis…

Batman Trades In Batmobile For Cybertruck
Babylon Bee

Batman Trades In Batmobile For Cybertruck

January 4, 2025

GOTHAM CITY — Batman has officially traded in the Batmobile for a Tesla Cybertruck.   Read MoreBabylon Bee

US Army To Add ‘Do You Intend To Carry Out a Massive Terrorist Attack’ To Application Form
Babylon Bee

US Army To Add ‘Do You Intend To Carry Out a Massive Terrorist Attack’ To Application Form

January 4, 2025

U.S. — In an effort to address recent violence, the United States Army has decided to begin asking applicants if…

Lost VeggieTales Episode Discovered Where David Brings King Saul 200 Severed Pickle Tips
Babylon Bee

Lost VeggieTales Episode Discovered Where David Brings King Saul 200 Severed Pickle Tips

January 3, 2025

TUSTIN, CA — A previously lost episode of the beloved children’s classic VeggieTales has surfaced that depicts a young Dave,…

Presbyterian Church To Begin Tasing Anyone Who Raises Hands During Worship
Babylon Bee

Presbyterian Church To Begin Tasing Anyone Who Raises Hands During Worship

January 3, 2025

FORKSVILLE, PA — As part of a new hardline stance being taken to start the new year, a local Presbyterian…

Bad Sign: Sushi Bar Run By White Dude
Babylon Bee

Bad Sign: Sushi Bar Run By White Dude

January 3, 2025

SAN FRANCISCO, CA — Looking for authentic sushi at a reasonable price? Look elsewhere. Bushido Sushi may look the part,…

FBI Baffled Terrorist Attack Occurred As They Imprisoned All Jan 6 Attendees
Babylon Bee

FBI Baffled Terrorist Attack Occurred As They Imprisoned All Jan 6 Attendees

January 3, 2025

U.S. — As the investigations continued into the deadly events of the new year, FBI agents were reportedly baffled that…

12 Bible Characters Reveal Their New Year’s Resolutions
Babylon Bee

12 Bible Characters Reveal Their New Year’s Resolutions

January 2, 2025

The start of the new year is traditionally a time when people make their resolutions to better themselves. While many…

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