Democrats Say They Are Perfectly Capable Of Rigging Elections Without Any Help From China
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Democrats disputed claims that China interfered in the 2020 U.S. election, declaring that they are perfectly…
Category: Babylon Bee
Taco Bell Releases New Imodium A-D Sauce Packets To Combat Explosive Diarrhea Outbreak
U.S. — Fast-food giant Taco Bell introduced Imodium A-D sauce packets to help customers combat the explosive diarrhea caused…
Christopher Nolan Criticized For Not Depicting Trojan Horse As Historically Accurate Large Wooden Rabbit
LOS ANGELES, CA — As critics continued to heap praise on Christopher Nolan’s The Odyssey, fans heavily criticized the…
Idaho Builds Border Wall Out Of Potatoes To Keep Out Californians
BOISE, ID — In a bold stand against the western invasion, Idaho Governor Brad Little announced today that the…
Hegseth Orders Any Military Personnel With Low Testosterone Be Transferred To The Navy
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Secretary of War Pete Hegseth issued a new order that any military member who is discovered…
Cockroach Maintains Composure Despite Making Contact With Journalist
SHERMAN OAKS, CA — A local cockroach somehow maintained his composure on camera despite unexpectedly making contact with a…
National Park Service Reminds Americans Not To Approach Bison, But If You Do, Make Sure Someone Captures A Hilarious Video Of It
U.S. — The U.S. National Park Service issued a reminder to avoid approaching the bison inside national parks, but…
CDC Advises Those With Diarrhea Parasite To Stay Within Six Feet Of Toilet
ATLANTA, GA — The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention issued an official recommendation this morning that those stricken…
Health Safety Tip: Before Consuming Lettuce, Try Being A Man And Eating Real Food
U.S. — In the wake of thousands falling ill due to parasitic infection from fresh produce, health experts are…
10 Rejected Titles For Biden’s New Memoir
At long last, the wait is over — President Joe Biden has written a memoir about his time in…