Report: The Reason TV Shows Take So Long to Make Now Is Because They Film in the Dark
U.S. — There are two major complaints about TV shows these days. One is that they take so long…
Category: Babylon Bee
Theologians Confirm Heaven’s Streets Of Gold Will Have No Cyclists
WORLD — The world’s leading theologians weighed in on the nature of Heaven this week, confirming what many have…
Child Psychologists Now Say Screen Time Is OK For Toddlers As Long As You’re Showing Them ‘Master And Commander: The Far Side Of The World’
BETHESDA, MD — A leading group of child psychologists suggested screen time is now considered “OK” for toddlers as…
Jimmy Kimmel To Write Script For New ‘Godfather’ Sequel
LOS ANGELES, CA — In a special joint announcement with legendary filmmaker Francis Ford Coppola, late-night talk show host…
Olympics Bans All Balls From Women’s Sports
LAUSANNE — In a landmark statement intended to simultaneously clarify lingering questions regarding trans athletes in events and prevent…
Man Unsure If What’s Missing In His Life Is Jesus Or Really Cool Jacket
CROMWELL, CT — On a chilly spring morning, local man Jim Harbor reportedly paused to consider whether what he…
7 Ways To Toughen Up Your Wimpy Kid
Kids these days. They’re pushovers. Back in the old days, every kid knew how to work, fight, and smoke…
Guy Who Pushed Over Reacher’s Motorcycle Announces Plan To Shoot John Wick’s Dog
BRENTWOOD, TN — The man who pushed over Jack Reacher’s motorcycle and was subsequently pounded into the ground has…
Local Couple Enjoys Romantic Two-Week Honeymoon In TSA Line
HOUSTON, TX — Local newlyweds Brandon and Amelia Stockwell reported having the time of their lives during a romantic…
Chicago White Sox Improve Playoff Chances By Switching To WNBA
CHICAGO, IL — In the wake of two historically bad seasons, the owner of the Chicago White Sox has…