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Category: Babylon Bee

Babylon Bee

In Devastating Blow, Newly Released Emails Reveal Trump Not Well-Liked By Pedophile

FinnNovember 15, 2025

    U.S. – In a huge blow to President Trump, newly released emails indicate that he was not well-liked by…

Babylon Bee

Five Guys Now Offering 50-Year Burger Financing

FinnNovember 14, 2025

    ALEXANDRIA, VA — Inspired by the Trump White House’s move toward 50-year mortgages, popular burger chain Five Guys announced…

Babylon Bee

Dodge Introduces New Truck Headlights That Blast Gamma Ray Bursts Into Your Eyeballs

FinnNovember 14, 2025

    AUBURN HILLS, MI — Truck manufacturer Dodge unveiled new headlights today that would come standard with new models and…

Babylon Bee

Bose Introduces New Mariah Carey-Canceling Headphones For Christmas

FinnNovember 14, 2025

    FRAMINGHAM, MA — Going out in public during the holiday season without being overcome with the desire to shove…

Babylon Bee

Poem On Statue Of Liberty Updated To Read ‘No Fatties’

FinnNovember 14, 2025

    NEW YORK, NY — As part of a change in immigration policy designed to limit the incoming of foreign…

Babylon Bee

Children’s Church Sermon Jam-Packed With Heresies

FinnNovember 13, 2025

    DALLAS, TX — The children’s pastor of Flame Passion Born Again Friends Fellowship Church caught the community’s attention after…

Babylon Bee

Megyn Kelly Gets Rid Of Old Pager Just To Be Safe

FinnNovember 13, 2025

    NEW YORK, NY — Political commentator Megyn Kelly quietly tossed her pager in the trash this week in what…

Babylon Bee

Liberal’s Emotional Support Dog Gets Emotional Support Dog

FinnNovember 13, 2025

    SEATTLE — Jenny McCoy, a local bookstore clerk with deep anxiety over climate change, reportedly transferred so much of…

Babylon Bee

Tucker Carlson Builds Time Machine To Kill Baby Churchill

FinnNovember 13, 2025

    WOODSTOCK, ME — On a mission to set right the great wrongs perpetrated upon the world during World War…

Babylon Bee

Trump Replaces Pennies With Cool New POGs

FinnNovember 13, 2025

    WASHINGTON, D.C. — After 232 years of continuous production, the final U.S. penny was minted in Philadelphia on Wednesday.…

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